x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Contains the details about white-listed characters.
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x31stOverlord
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x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by x31stOverlord » 10 Feb 2018, 21:08

Byond ID: X31stOverlord

Marine Name (so we know who you are; if you play alien mostly, state that here): Wolfgang Schneider, Roscoe Barrett

Name of the character you want whitelisted (The name your predator will use. This must match your in-game predator name): Zathar-Veraz

Are you familiar with the Predator Code Of Honor?: I am indeed.

Character background (An ADEQUATE description and story of your predators background):
► Show Spoiler
How do you intend to play your predator (as in, describe HOW you will act/play your predator)?: My play-style as a predator will, as with most predators, revolve around the Hunt, does this mean I will go around robusting marines and xenos alike with impunity? No. Zathar will choose his prey based on their strength or intelligence and follow them, finding out whom they associate with, what their strengths are, what their perceived weaknesses are, he will poke at their nerves and strike at those close to his prey, not killing them, but injuring them and leaving them to cry out for aid, leaving items for the prey to find that he takes from those who die trying to fight him and try to make them come after him, drawing them into a location of his choosing to hunt and deliver the final blow before extracting the trophy for his tophy wall.

Why should we whitelist you?: I am applying for this whitelist because I am a huge fan of the Predators in the films and on the round, despite them being a very, very, very, easy role to both incite Salt and attract a lot of hate due to their supposed OP-ness and uneccisity in the round. I see them as a potential tool to move rounds along and make a round more interesting when played correctly as I've seen a few times when they are present. I'd like to add to the game and the community by adding engaging scenarios and interact with the marines and (a lesser point here due to the Xenos lower RP standpoints) the Aliens. I am quite active on the server and enjoy myself here in all of the roles that I play and wish to continue to do so, hopefully, in the future I also aim to apply for Commander and Synthetic roles. But my first desire is to apply successfully for the Predator whitelist.

Have you been banned from CM in the last month for any reason (we will check, and lies may result in immediate denial)?: I have not been banned in the last month.

Are you currently banned from any other servers and if so, why?: I am not to my knowledge banned on any other server. I only play on here, occasionally on Paradise for my AI games.

Do you understand that any player - donor or otherwise - can have their whitelist status revoked should they break our rules or disobey the Predator Code of Honor?: I do indeed understand and accept that this is the best way to preserve the standards of Preds.
Yautja - Zathar-Veraz Wolfgang Schneider - CO, CL, SO, XO, Synthetic Unit Joshua Roscoe Barrett - Spec, SGCMP, MP Ancient Empress, Ancient Runner (69)
https://i.imgur.com/8NP5Mbl.png

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by Lukey111 » 11 Feb 2018, 13:24

I know your character well.
I like how you hunt your prey.
Story is nice.
Don't have the 'best' activity in the forums/replying to pred apps (which is should be fine).
Competent player.
I have good RP moments with this guy.
And, I look forward to a duel.

1+
I play as Monday "Scatter" Williams, he is the guy that takes no one seriously, except his good friend, his work.
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"I'm in engineering most of the time, I like leading the nerds" - Monday 'Scatter' Williams
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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by x31stOverlord » 12 Feb 2018, 03:54

Lukey111 wrote:
11 Feb 2018, 13:24
I know your character well.
I like how you hunt your prey.
Story is nice.
Don't have the 'best' activity in the forums/replying to pred apps (which is should be fine).
Competent player.
I have good RP moments with this guy.
And, I look forward to a duel.

1+

Thank you for the feedback! And thank you for the +1 I'm glad you like the story, it is relieving to know it was okay!

I am one hundred percent aware of my lack of engagement with pred apps, mostly because I don't see myself as a fitting judge. Whilst being able to disseminate stories well. I actually don't enjoy being critical of others work especially. One of my flaws I'm afraid. But if it becomes an issue I'll certainly begin to.

Zathar will seek out the worthiest prey. I have my eyes on targets and I want to make the rounds for these select few (who I won't name. But you know who you are) an experience akin to the films. Hope to make the game interesting for all involved in the hunt, without just killing and leaving salt in the mouth!
Yautja - Zathar-Veraz Wolfgang Schneider - CO, CL, SO, XO, Synthetic Unit Joshua Roscoe Barrett - Spec, SGCMP, MP Ancient Empress, Ancient Runner (69)
https://i.imgur.com/8NP5Mbl.png

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by Lukey111 » 12 Feb 2018, 15:03

x31stOverlord wrote:
12 Feb 2018, 03:54
Thank you for the feedback! And thank you for the +1 I'm glad you like the story, it is relieving to know it was okay!

I am one hundred percent aware of my lack of engagement with pred apps, mostly because I don't see myself as a fitting judge. Whilst being able to disseminate stories well. I actually don't enjoy being critical of others work especially. One of my flaws I'm afraid. But if it becomes an issue I'll certainly begin to.

Zathar will seek out the worthiest prey. I have my eyes on targets and I want to make the rounds for these select few (who I won't name. But you know who you are) an experience akin to the films. Hope to make the game interesting for all involved in the hunt, without just killing and leaving salt in the mouth!
If you get this accepted, it would help if you got more active on there. Just because it helps other people gets theirs fixed.

Let's say your app, you mainly don't care what people say, you just want feedback, and how you can fix it.
I play as Monday "Scatter" Williams, he is the guy that takes no one seriously, except his good friend, his work.
Image Image
"I'm in engineering most of the time, I like leading the nerds" - Monday 'Scatter' Williams
"There’s no such thing as a crowded battlefield. Battlefields are lonely places." —General Alfred M. Gray, 29th CMC

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by x31stOverlord » 12 Feb 2018, 18:36

Lukey111 wrote:
12 Feb 2018, 15:03
If you get this accepted, it would help if you got more active on there. Just because it helps other people gets theirs fixed.

Let's say your app, you mainly don't care what people say, you just want feedback, and how you can fix it.
Oh, I understand the purpose of the feedback on other apps. And to be frank I would likely begin to give advice and tips for others if I get whitelisted.

I just don't want to give advice to anyone when I'm not in a position to "accurately" give information, if you know what I mean.
Yautja - Zathar-Veraz Wolfgang Schneider - CO, CL, SO, XO, Synthetic Unit Joshua Roscoe Barrett - Spec, SGCMP, MP Ancient Empress, Ancient Runner (69)
https://i.imgur.com/8NP5Mbl.png

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by MacBlaze » 15 Feb 2018, 13:04

Nice player, good story that plays like a Predator comic, Active on forums, Respectable time as forum member. +1
Johan 'Albrecht' Scherer, Greedy CT, kind MP and average grunt.

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by x31stOverlord » 16 Feb 2018, 07:34

MacBlaze wrote:
15 Feb 2018, 13:04
Nice player, good story that plays like a Predator comic, Active on forums, Respectable time as forum member. +1
Much appreciated with the +1.

I was aiming for a story based on a "hunt" and example how a hunt on one of my rounds might look like and feel like. As opposed to a "Zathar was born to a uber hunter and blessed from birth for greatness and trained every day to be the bestest hunter there ever was"

But seriously, thanks.
Yautja - Zathar-Veraz Wolfgang Schneider - CO, CL, SO, XO, Synthetic Unit Joshua Roscoe Barrett - Spec, SGCMP, MP Ancient Empress, Ancient Runner (69)
https://i.imgur.com/8NP5Mbl.png

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by DriedMilk » 19 Feb 2018, 10:03

+1

Does good RP as XO and CL.

App is well made and interesting, for sure will make an excellent pred
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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by x31stOverlord » 19 Feb 2018, 11:28

DriedMilk wrote:
19 Feb 2018, 10:03
+1

Does good RP as XO and CL.

App is well made and interesting, for sure will make an excellent pred
Commander Kennel! Thank you for the positive!

Thoroughly enjoy irritating people as CL, especially Commanders.

*salute
Yautja - Zathar-Veraz Wolfgang Schneider - CO, CL, SO, XO, Synthetic Unit Joshua Roscoe Barrett - Spec, SGCMP, MP Ancient Empress, Ancient Runner (69)
https://i.imgur.com/8NP5Mbl.png

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by Bancrose » 20 Feb 2018, 18:04

Solid +1.

My German sidekick in command is calm, cool and collected and can get shit done.

I think he can extend his GREAT RP as a pred.
Commander Councilman. Along with Takethehot56, Lumdor, Dr.Lance, Frans Fieffer. PM me or any of them for inquiries about Commander.

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by Nightwolf901 » 21 Feb 2018, 02:00

Overall App looks great, Story was a bit long but sometimes we need a good read. Style is okay can't really do anything special to the style. Forum activity is :Ok_Hand: +1 my dude
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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by MattAtlas » 21 Feb 2018, 16:41

Great roleplayer, good story that reads well and has good pacing. Would make a good Predator, +1.
I'm part of the Synthetic Council with ThesoldierLLJK and Jakkkk. Feel free to DM me on the forums or Discord (Matt#5881) if you have any questions about synths.

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by Weaselburg » 23 Feb 2018, 12:29

I have seen you around on the Server, good RPer. +1
Hivemind, Elite Runner (320) (follow) hisses, 'SORRY I STEPPED ON THE BUTTON MA.
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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by x31stOverlord » 25 Feb 2018, 15:43

Bancrosexd wrote:
20 Feb 2018, 18:04
Solid +1.

My German sidekick in command is calm, cool and collected and can get shit done.

I think he can extend his GREAT RP as a pred.
ACHTUNG! Danke!

Thank you for the updoot. I shall endeavour to not disgrace the premier German Commander. Or endeavour to add a Nazi Skull to my collection *thinks*
Nightwolf901 wrote:
21 Feb 2018, 02:00
Overall App looks great, Story was a bit long but sometimes we need a good read. Style is okay can't really do anything special to the style. Forum activity is :Ok_Hand: +1 my dude
Thank you. I am sorry you thought the story was on the longside. I'll be honest, I thought the story was too short! :D

*thumbs up*
MattAtlas wrote:
21 Feb 2018, 16:41
Great roleplayer, good story that reads well and has good pacing. Would make a good Predator, +1.
Thank you for the compliments and the plus one! :)
Weaselburg wrote:
23 Feb 2018, 12:29
I have seen you around on the Server, good RPer. +1
Thank you for the plus one! Also thank you for the Good RPer.


Thanks to you all.

It helps that I'm a huge nerd and have been RPing on WoW for like... Lots of years.
Yautja - Zathar-Veraz Wolfgang Schneider - CO, CL, SO, XO, Synthetic Unit Joshua Roscoe Barrett - Spec, SGCMP, MP Ancient Empress, Ancient Runner (69)
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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by Bancrose » 25 Feb 2018, 16:48

You may attempt to add a Kraut skull to your collection sir but don't think I won't pull the Mateba first.
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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by edda » 25 Feb 2018, 19:27

I've seen you from a distance, and you've always made a good impression. Have never RP'd with you directly, though.

Good luck.
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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by x31stOverlord » 26 Feb 2018, 02:03

Bancrosexd wrote:
25 Feb 2018, 16:48
You may attempt to add a Kraut skull to your collection sir but don't think I won't pull the Mateba first.
I think Apop can speak for how likely to hit me with that mateba of yours *grin*
Yautja - Zathar-Veraz Wolfgang Schneider - CO, CL, SO, XO, Synthetic Unit Joshua Roscoe Barrett - Spec, SGCMP, MP Ancient Empress, Ancient Runner (69)
https://i.imgur.com/8NP5Mbl.png

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by x31stOverlord » 26 Feb 2018, 02:06

edda wrote:
25 Feb 2018, 19:27
I've seen you from a distance, and you've always made a good impression. Have never RP'd with you directly, though.

Good luck.
Thanks! Yeah. Due to my usual roles you won't get much direct interaction with me.

XO. SO and CL unless you are in similar situations.

CMP/MP Unless you break THE LAW

And by some miracle chance I get spec I'll be with glorious Charlie squad.
Yautja - Zathar-Veraz Wolfgang Schneider - CO, CL, SO, XO, Synthetic Unit Joshua Roscoe Barrett - Spec, SGCMP, MP Ancient Empress, Ancient Runner (69)
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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by Bancrose » 26 Feb 2018, 14:57

x31stOverlord wrote:
26 Feb 2018, 02:03
I think Apop can speak for how likely to hit me with that mateba of yours *grin*
Oof ouch my Commander Bones
Commander Councilman. Along with Takethehot56, Lumdor, Dr.Lance, Frans Fieffer. PM me or any of them for inquiries about Commander.

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by Youngblood » 27 Feb 2018, 21:56

I've seen you around on the server, and generally speaking, I feel that you are a good influence on the way rounds play out. So as far as maturity, general ability and willingness to roleplay goes, I'd have nothing against giving you a shot at the role. If anything, I'd ask for a little twist to your intended playstyle. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with it in particular, but since there's such a small selection of predators, I'd love for each and everyone to have a distinguishable playstyle, one that reflects on the character and its past. Your story is a-okay, while it's not groundbreaking, as far as originality goes, it does go to show the effort you put into the application.

+1 and good luck.

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by NGGJamie » 06 Mar 2018, 11:17

A well written story overall even if there are a few flaws with its presentation.
  • Too much comma use. Use more periods to separate different ideas.
  • A few missed apostrophes with saying the clan’s hunting ground. No big deal.
  • Mentioning the trap specifically is an instance of Chekov’s Gun. Leave objects that don’t serve particular purpose out of the spotlight as specific mention raises expectations for that item.
  • Good use of paragraphs
  • Writing appears mature and actively employs ”Show, Don’t Tell” principles. This is one of its bigger strengths.
  • Good understanding of Predator lore and personality is shown.
A solid +1 from me. Well done.
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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by Weaselburg » 06 Mar 2018, 20:30

Well written and good replies, but you wouldn't attack someone tending a wounded man. Otherwise great, here is my +1
Hivemind, Elite Runner (320) (follow) hisses, 'SORRY I STEPPED ON THE BUTTON MA.
Kaptin Morgan: we must unite to collect the shattered pieces of the tribes code that are spread among the 16 feweh alts
Hivemind, Mature Crusher (21) hisses, 'I CAN MEME AGAIN'
You know, it really surprised me when IKEA bought Disney.- The biggest surprise was KFC buying IBM, to be honest
Philby0 wrote: They're so white they can colonise anything at will
PFC Rex Lombardi shouts, "Boys if you jump out of the dropship you are guarenteed a pass into the paratroopers regiment!"
OOC: Jakkkk: weaselburg got t o u c h e d
OOC: Driecg36: a sentient demon had taken residence in shutte code
OOC: Daswurmtmich: GIBING WILL CONTINUE UNTIL MORALE IMPROVES

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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by zoboomafoo » 07 Mar 2018, 02:04

This guy RP's well, I've seen him around quite a bit. Roscoe is one of my favorite MP's.

Your story was also a good read, I think you would be an interesting addition to the predator cast.

+1 for me.
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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by Heckenshutze » 08 Mar 2018, 08:08

The support of the players and the review by Jamie has convinced me, regardless, your app is solid, you have my +1.
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Re: x31stOverlords Predator App - Zathar-Veraz

Post by x31stOverlord » 17 Mar 2018, 16:54

Youngblood wrote:
27 Feb 2018, 21:56
I've seen you around on the server, and generally speaking, I feel that you are a good influence on the way rounds play out. So as far as maturity, general ability and willingness to roleplay goes, I'd have nothing against giving you a shot at the role. If anything, I'd ask for a little twist to your intended playstyle. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with it in particular, but since there's such a small selection of predators, I'd love for each and everyone to have a distinguishable playstyle, one that reflects on the character and its past. Your story is a-okay, while it's not groundbreaking, as far as originality goes, it does go to show the effort you put into the application.

+1 and good luck.
Well, thank you for the feedback, I shall certainly try to diversify myself from the others if I were to be given the chance at the role, to make things more interesting and give a sense of unknown when I am in the rounds as a Yautja, given that it is a somewhat rare occurrence, each predator encounter should be 'special' and you should be able to tell that each Pred player is different in both their impact on the round as a whole and get a sense of difference between them, which is harder to portray in a 2D spessman game, but I will try to ensure I am worth the opporunity, thank you for the feedback and the positive response. *salute
NGGJamie wrote:
06 Mar 2018, 11:17
A well written story overall even if there are a few flaws with its presentation.
  • Too much comma use. Use more periods to separate different ideas.
  • A few missed apostrophes with saying the clan’s hunting ground. No big deal.
  • Mentioning the trap specifically is an instance of Chekov’s Gun. Leave objects that don’t serve particular purpose out of the spotlight as specific mention raises expectations for that item.
  • Good use of paragraphs
  • Writing appears mature and actively employs ”Show, Don’t Tell” principles. This is one of its bigger strengths.
  • Good understanding of Predator lore and personality is shown.
A solid +1 from me. Well done.
Thank you Jamie, I am aware that my story has some issues with it, when I had proof read it a few times I was happy, but that tends to happen when self criticising, you tend to manage to miss things that others will pick upon immediately, thank you for pointing out some of my issues, I shall certainly re-make the story if I am unsuccessful in this app to hopefully cover and change to remove/repair the story to the highest standard. Appreciated is the feedback and the positive response as ever.
Weaselburg wrote:
06 Mar 2018, 20:30
Well written and good replies, but you wouldn't attack someone tending a wounded man. Otherwise great, here is my +1
Thank you for the compliment, it took me a while to put together the story, however, I believe you may have been confused about the attacking the wounded/scout treating the wounded. Zathar ignored the wounded scout and the one who was tending to them, attacking only those who were on their feet and armed. Thank you for the positive response in either case. I shall re-read the story and examine to see if I had ambiguously worded the areas to ensure no one else gets the wrong idea, it could be that I had made an error in the story (shocked gasps)
zoboomafoo wrote:
07 Mar 2018, 02:04
This guy RP's well, I've seen him around quite a bit. Roscoe is one of my favorite MP's.

Your story was also a good read, I think you would be an interesting addition to the predator cast.

+1 for me.
Thanks my man! Roscoe is chill. And thanks for the compliment on the story and the positive note. I hope to indeed be a positive influence on roleplay within rounds to the very best of my abilities, even to the point of creating drama, horror and causing alarm/fear in the marines as they are stalked by the unknown hunter. The stalker. The trapper.

The predator.
Heckenshutze wrote:
08 Mar 2018, 08:08
The support of the players and the review by Jamie has convinced me, regardless, your app is solid, you have my +1.
Thanks Heck, support from a good Mod is good to see. I hope you enjoyed the story and I hope to have more encounters with you in game in character as any of my chars. *salute


- Side note. Lots of responses, thank you all for your feedback, if you have any additional comments/concerns, please leave them here or message me myself, I will try to get around to answering/resolving any of them that you may have and as always, have a great game!
Yautja - Zathar-Veraz Wolfgang Schneider - CO, CL, SO, XO, Synthetic Unit Joshua Roscoe Barrett - Spec, SGCMP, MP Ancient Empress, Ancient Runner (69)
https://i.imgur.com/8NP5Mbl.png

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