Zazin Guan-thwei

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edda
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Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by edda » 11 Dec 2017, 22:31

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Edda

Marine Name

As a marine, I have taken several names, usually retiring each one after a significant death. Previous names include Ibb Sands, Ambros Castellvi, Nanno van Aulen, and Ediz Melitine. Now I am playing as Miro Janosevic. I am probably going to stick with Miro, because community recognition is somewhat important.

Most common roles are squad medic, squad engineer, and pilot officer. Secondary roles are squad specialist (typically scout), military police, and staff officer.

I also frequently play xenos. Unless told to otherwise by the queen, I aim for upgraded spitter or boiler.

Name of the character you want whitelisted.

Zazin Guan-thwei
zazin: completely centred/within oneself
Guan-thwei: Nightblood clan

Are you familiar with the Predator Code of Honor?

Yes. I have read through it multiple times. I am confident I can consistently and accurately uphold it.

Character Background

Bad Blood
► Show Spoiler
The Hunt
► Show Spoiler
Mercy
► Show Spoiler
Tribune
► Show Spoiler
How do you intend to play your predator?

Zazin was once on the path to become a yautja philosopher. Due to his failures while adjudicating the fate of a bad blood, his world changed from that of contemplation to that of the hunt.

Zazin is not as strong or fast as his brethren who were conditioned from birth for combat. His style is meticulous and observant. The more-aggressive yautja will call him slow or even passive. He enjoys watching combat, and will often just stand back and watch marines fight xenos, or watch his fellow yautja brothers engage in honorable combat with their prey. To entice him into combat, a prey either has to be disgustingly unworthy or particularly interesting. He will only occasionally hunt ordinary, worthy prey to ensure his skills remain in good shape.

When it comes to combat, he is just as likely to engage in skirmish-style fighting as he is to fight directly. He has no compunctions about withdrawing, unless said target is actively harming another yautja in a dishonorable manner, in which case he will fight to the death.

Towards worthy opponents he is merciful. However, past experiences have made it such that he vehemently dislikes the unworthy, particularly those who have dishonorably harmed fellow yautja. Towards the unworthy he will give no quarter.

He enjoys contemplating the line between honor and dishonor, worth and unworth. With fellow yautja, he will often comment on their fights, or on particularly interesting marines or xenos, through the lens of the Code. He is reserved but relaxed.

He really likes stew.

Why should we whitelist you?

Pros
- I will in all likelihood never break the Code, not even arguably so, since Zazin's character puts him on the very safe side of adhering by it.
- I RP. I send good faxes. I play and DM D&D so I do RP outside of SS13.
- To add to the above, I won't have any problem adhering to yautja lore. Or CM lore, for that matter.
- I communicate a lot as a player. Anyone who has played with any of my marine characters will know how little I shut up.
- I don't break server rules. I ahelp a lot about what I can and can't do.
- I do not mind dying for the sake of RP. Or dying in general, since I'm never salty about it.

Cons
- Not robust. Not a new player, either, but...
- My playstyle might be too passive for admins' tastes.
- Zazin is not a very stand-out character.
- I'm still in the process of exploring predator mechanics by watching them as ghost.
- I probably won't play predator that often.
- I am pretty new to CM. So I understand completely if this is a major reason not to whitelist Zazin.

Have you been banned from CM in the last month for any reason?

No, never banned.

One warning when a griefer opened fire on me and I returned fire. I won't be doing that again.

Are you currently banned from any other servers and if so, why?

No. Never banned from any server. In fact, my only warning in any server has been on CM. I don't think I've even ever been brigged for any non-story, non-round-specific reason, in any server.

Do you understand that any player - donor or otherwise - can have their whitelist status revoked should they break our rules or disobey the Predator Code of Honor?

Yes. I wouldn't have it any other way.
Finnian Cottier

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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by NescauComToddy » 11 Dec 2017, 23:10

Your application was great, well detailed and exploited to the maximum by you, which is a great start. As much as your backstory has slightly developed your character, you could have made a specific section in it defining Zazin's concepts and mind-set, such as his faith, the way your character respects his prey, and in general, his personality.

Unfortunately, my biggest problem with your application is your activity. I am unable to recognize any of your names, and therefore, I am unable to state if you are a good role-player or not.

You only have 20 posts, and the minimum in my point of view required to be whitelisted is 80. Since you are new to the server, you should have waited at least a few months before posting your application. For now, I will remain neutral, because although your application has been interesting and well made, I am unable to recognize you due to your activity and your little time on the server.

Take advantage that we are at the end of the year and try to dedicate a little more of your time on the server this month to make you known in the community. Post your replies in the various threads of the forum and participate in the community if possible.

I'll be happy to provide you with my +1 if I do such and I'm sure many others will too.
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edda
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by edda » 11 Dec 2017, 23:21

NescauComToddy wrote:
11 Dec 2017, 23:10
Your application was great, well detailed and exploited to the maximum by you, which is a great start. As much as your backstory has slightly developed your character, you could have made a specific section in it defining Zazin's concepts and mind-set, such as his faith, the way your character respects his prey, and in general, his personality.

Unfortunately, my biggest problem with your application is your activity. I am unable to recognize any of your names, and therefore, I am unable to state if you are a good role-player or not.

You only have 20 posts, and the minimum in my point of view required to be whitelisted is 80. Since you are new to the server, you should have waited at least a few months before posting your application. For now, I will remain neutral, because although your application has been interesting and well made, I am unable to recognize you due to your activity and your little time on the server.
Understandable point on the activity. I am sufficiently happy if you think the application is good, since I certainly do not mind trying again in however many months when my activity is up. It will take a while, after all, to be more active and recognized.

I will think about personality more when I reapply. Thank you for your feedback.
Finnian Cottier

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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by NescauComToddy » 11 Dec 2017, 23:30

Hey, remember this does not mean that your application will be denied. Remember that you can easily fix your activity and be recognized in the community if you participate naturally in it. I am sure you are more than capable of being accepted if you do an 'up' in your activity.

Also, you're welcome. Again, good luck.
Peter.

Man'sur, The Victorious', Cetanu's Al'nagara.

Retired staff (moderator).

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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by Thatnewguy1 » 12 Dec 2017, 09:42

Pred APP Review

Story-10/10, beautifully constructed story that describes your character very well

Forum account-No idea who you are

Player in game-No idea who you are

Summary-Your presence in the game speaks volumes about your chances of being a predator. HOWEVER. This story was so well done, I'm gonna go ahead and give you A +.5.

I would suggest you start posting on other posts, as well as getting yourself some battle buddies and you will go far.

Good luck
Delta boys for life
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by Ghostdex » 12 Dec 2017, 16:47

I love the story, you wrote it pretty well as others have said. The only actual issue I have with this application is your forum activity, I have no clue who you are, aside from this, really good application and it feels like you put a lot of effort into it.

Step up your activity and i’ll leave my +1 here, but for now I’m neutral
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by edda » 12 Dec 2017, 20:13

Thatnewguy1 wrote:
12 Dec 2017, 09:42
Pred APP Review

Story-10/10, beautifully constructed story that describes your character very well

Forum account-No idea who you are

Player in game-No idea who you are

Summary-Your presence in the game speaks volumes about your chances of being a predator. HOWEVER. This story was so well done, I'm gonna go ahead and give you A +.5.

I would suggest you start posting on other posts, as well as getting yourself some battle buddies and you will go far.

Good luck
Thanks for the advice, I forgot battle buddying was a thing.
ghostdex wrote:
12 Dec 2017, 16:47
I love the story, you wrote it pretty well as others have said. The only actual issue I have with this application is your forum activity, I have no clue who you are, aside from this, really good application and it feels like you put a lot of effort into it.

Step up your activity and i’ll leave my +1 here, but for now I’m neutral
Gotcha. Seems the primary concern is my activity. I'm sure even if I don't get it up any time soon, if I wind up reapplying I should be better known by then. Thanks for reading.
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by Kerek » 12 Dec 2017, 22:52

If only I knew your characters! This story was so good! Its one of them few recently that had me engaged constantly! If only I’ve seen you in game I’d give you a plus one. Personally, I’d like to have this pred whitelist sit around for a little while. Play a TON of marine for awhile and if I see you, see your a good roleplayer I’ll come back and +1 this, at the moment +0. What is your time zone?
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by spartanbobby » 13 Dec 2017, 12:53

I'll keep my eye out for your character then come back and see what I think, Your app looks pretty solid and like everyone else said it's a good idea to up that post count.
Best of luck To You.
!!! John 'Spartan' Murry Hulij thar'n !!! Pred Council Man

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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by Sailor Dave » 13 Dec 2017, 13:48

The story was definitely an enjoyable read, and played out in a way I think would fit in-game nicely. Nicely detailed without being overly wordy, and I like the characters quite a bit.

Your playstyle is a very standard choice in most applications, but I feel like it's backed up a little more appropriately with Guan-thwei's background as a Philosopher, rather than a proper warrior.

That said, I'd recommend that you take the time to watch a few more predator rounds and consider not just how they hunt, but how you could do things a bit differently from them besides being 'passive and observant'. It's okay if it's similar to something other predators are doing already, just do something that sticks out in a good way. Maybe you do something with your prey before/after you fight them, maybe you behave a particular way towards certain foes, maybe you like to have your own rituals that you perform at various times. Think of something that suits your style, or you think would be fun to do.

I'm a bit concerned about the lack of combat ability. It's rare you'll get the opportunity to fight individual opponents. You usually have to peel them away from their allies somehow, or deal with the allies yourself. That's not an easy thing to do if you can't fight at least decently.
► Show Spoiler
It's a bit soon for a predator application, but if you can manage lots of activity in a few weeks - a month or so, you might be able to squeeze in if you get good feedback over that time. Get some posts in on topics you think are interesting. Try to stick with one character to get your name out, definitely make some buddies with other marines and get them familiar with you. The story is excellent, but I want to make sure you're not a salty mister in-game first. If you can manage that, I'd like to give you a +1. I'll stay neutral until then.
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by forwardslashN » 13 Dec 2017, 18:18

One of the best predator background stories posted. Stick with CM for a while, and I think you have a good chance of getting whitelisted.
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by edda » 14 Dec 2017, 14:34

Kneez wrote:
12 Dec 2017, 22:52
If only I knew your characters! This story was so good! Its one of them few recently that had me engaged constantly! If only I’ve seen you in game I’d give you a plus one. Personally, I’d like to have this pred whitelist sit around for a little while. Play a TON of marine for awhile and if I see you, see your a good roleplayer I’ll come back and +1 this, at the moment +0. What is your time zone?
Thanks! I'm -4 or -5, depending on the month, but I play at odd hours since my job isn't a 9-5 one.

If there isn't a time limit on how long my app can sit around, I'm sure I'll eventually see you. Actually, I've definitely seen CO Horace Wallenber once or twice, so I've already seen you. I guess it's just a game now of "notice me".
spartanbobby wrote:
13 Dec 2017, 12:53
I'll keep my eye out for your character then come back and see what I think, Your app looks pretty solid and like everyone else said it's a good idea to up that post count.
Best of luck To You.
Thanks for reading.
Sailor Dave wrote:
13 Dec 2017, 13:48
The story was definitely an enjoyable read, and played out in a way I think would fit in-game nicely. Nicely detailed without being overly wordy, and I like the characters quite a bit.

Your playstyle is a very standard choice in most applications, but I feel like it's backed up a little more appropriately with Guan-thwei's background as a Philosopher, rather than a proper warrior.

That said, I'd recommend that you take the time to watch a few more predator rounds and consider not just how they hunt, but how you could do things a bit differently from them besides being 'passive and observant'. It's okay if it's similar to something other predators are doing already, just do something that sticks out in a good way. Maybe you do something with your prey before/after you fight them, maybe you behave a particular way towards certain foes, maybe you like to have your own rituals that you perform at various times. Think of something that suits your style, or you think would be fun to do.

I'm a bit concerned about the lack of combat ability. It's rare you'll get the opportunity to fight individual opponents. You usually have to peel them away from their allies somehow, or deal with the allies yourself. That's not an easy thing to do if you can't fight at least decently.
► Show Spoiler
It's a bit soon for a predator application, but if you can manage lots of activity in a few weeks - a month or so, you might be able to squeeze in if you get good feedback over that time. Get some posts in on topics you think are interesting. Try to stick with one character to get your name out, definitely make some buddies with other marines and get them familiar with you. The story is excellent, but I want to make sure you're not a salty mister in-game first. If you can manage that, I'd like to give you a +1. I'll stay neutral until then.
I'll keep your advice in mind, thanks for being so thorough with it. Thinking about pred playstyle really took a lot of time, and I admit I'm still unsatisfied with what I have. If I wind up reapplying, I'll definitely improve the background and give Zazin a stronger, more distinct personality. This was exactly my worry when I listed as a con that Zazin didn't really stand out.

I might do it now, but I don't think I'm allowed to edit the app, am I?
forwardslashN wrote:
13 Dec 2017, 18:18
One of the best predator background stories posted. Stick with CM for a while, and I think you have a good chance of getting whitelisted.
Thanks for reading!
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by edda » 20 Dec 2017, 00:41

Due to a particularly epic death, I felt it was necessary to retire Miro Janosevic. Also because I forgot I should be staying on one character.

New character is Finnian Cottier. I will actually stick to this one.

I was ghosting one round and saw some particularly inspired RP by a pred whose name I can't quite recall. Dueling a marine on LZ1 landing pad long after xenos took the Almayer. Lots of small actions that really brought the character to life, made me rethink my predator app. I think Sailor Dave's point is accurate, Zazin needs to be less bland.

Can I resubmit a background/personality or is that not kosher?
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by Sneakyr » 20 Dec 2017, 02:06

edda wrote:
20 Dec 2017, 00:41
Due to a particularly epic death, I felt it was necessary to retire Miro Janosevic. Also because I forgot I should be staying on one character.

New character is Finnian Cottier. I will actually stick to this one.

I was ghosting one round and saw some particularly inspired RP by a pred whose name I can't quite recall. Dueling a marine on LZ1 landing pad long after xenos took the Almayer. Lots of small actions that really brought the character to life, made me rethink my predator app. I think Sailor Dave's point is accurate, Zazin needs to be less bland.

Can I resubmit a background/personality or is that not kosher?
You can not change the application, but you can alter the personality/background should you be accepted. I imagine no one would complain if you slightly changed the *personality* of your character assuming you wrote it as excellently as you did your background, created a new post in this thread, and did not attempt to wipe away any previous personality but instead tweaked or elucidated existing characteristics.

Now, normally I understand that pure positivity is no way to improve, but I'm both strapped for time and having difficulties seeing anything wrong with your background. So, yeah, I like it.

Forum posts are low. Miro Jani-whatsit was a competent character and never a shitter, but I never saw much of him besides that. Finn has been fun to be around in Delta squad. I busted you out of a hive once, where you died as the SL and I dragged ourselves (and you) away from an incoming OB.

Bland is fine when the application is this good. I actually enjoyed reading the background. Typically I look through them the same way I would if I were grading them, but I read yours as if I were beginning a novel.

You don't have to be good at combat if you're clever.

Additionally, I was the pred you refer to in the post I quote above. This puts me in a strange situation, as I believe your application is significantly better and your character possessing of more potential than mine and yet you rethink your application because of me. Don't give it up too soon.

Finally, I must apologize for the disjointed nature of this post. I leap around to whatever comes to mind here rather than a typical point by point analysis, but as I said, strapped for time.
+1, assuming you continue to be active. Good luck.
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by Robotic Potato » 21 Dec 2017, 12:23

I do enjoy your story, but the common complaint on this app I can't say I have really seen you too much, though I'm not too much worried about your play style being a bit bland. I'll keep my eye out for you before making a decision but for now I'm neutral
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by Redikalzip » 28 Dec 2017, 11:15

I'll stay neutral here, because you really need more active in game. Not seen your characters before, bad, don't know how you doing RP. (Because you have alot of characters)

Story is very detaled, good for reading. Im not sure about kills bad blood making you ready to hunt (Blooded status), hmh.
And few things about predator activity. You should be medium-high active in the game, if you want be accepted. No one want have Predator accepted, who playing rarely.

About playstyle, I can say same as my predators-friends, standart. It's not bad, really, but standart.
You said "Not robust", seems strange. Passive gameplay, want you just be cloaked 2 hours and watch on battalies?

So, its my opinion about your predator application. Good story, a- passive playstyle. Good luck with Application and bye.

P.S: Last question, but how elite hunter became Bad Blood? As showd comics/films and books... 88% of all badbloods was young hunters, and no one of predators want special killing bad blood. (As standart, elders send Bad Bloods on prisonplanet).
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by edda » 28 Dec 2017, 17:59

Redikal V wrote:
28 Dec 2017, 11:15
P.S: Last question, but how elite hunter became Bad Blood? As showd comics/films and books... 88% of all badbloods was young hunters, and no one of predators want special killing bad blood. (As standart, elders send Bad Bloods on prisonplanet).
In my story, the bad blood was an unblooded who poisoned his elder dishonorably.
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by Sneakyr » 04 Jan 2018, 21:03

Haven't seen you in game too much recently. Are you still interested? Have you been active and I've just been missing you?
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by edda » 06 Jan 2018, 01:08

I haven't played much the last week on account of New Year's parties, work, and other games.

I'm still interested in CM, and although playing a predator might be interesting, I'm not too attached to the idea of the role, so I don't feel very strongly about playing just to gain community recognition. If you feel my playtime is becoming too sparse to support this app, I won't hold it against you; it's very fair.

Also, before New Year's I've mainly been playing PO, which might've impacted how often Frankie Day and Finnian Cottier saw one another. Now that I've gotten a satisfying round with it, I might not play it nearly as often.
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by Stripetail » 08 Jan 2018, 15:58

This is a really nice app, and I've seen you as Ibb Sands, I now know why I haven't seen you in a long while. o7

Stick around, you've got a really high potential in my eyes and I support you being given a shot at The Hunt. +1
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by Feweh » 11 Jan 2018, 19:01

More feedback required

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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by edda » 25 Jan 2018, 06:54

Feweh wrote:
11 Jan 2018, 19:01
More feedback required
Hey Feweh, don't know how long these apps can stand up, but right now IRL I'm applying for jobs and interviewing, and I work in quant trading so the process is very time-consuming, intensive, and requires a ton of preparation.

This will severely diminish my ability to play, so feel free to deny my app on account of low play time. If ever I have a bunch of free time in the future, hopefully after I secure a job and feel comfortable in a position, I'll reapply. This will likely be a lot longer than the reapplication wait period.
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Re: Zazin Guan-thwei

Post by Feweh » 06 Feb 2018, 14:32

Denied

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