Alien funny/epic/sad stories.

[AverageSpitter]

Title is pretty self explanatory, come and share your most hilarious experiences as xeno, biggest fuck ups or times where the hive were the badasses they are supossed to be.

[zoboomafoo]

Every time I get body blocked by other xenos and end up dying, ever.

[taketheshot56]

[Rikman]

Was crusher in prison station before the ovi update, marines cut us off from some others on the east side, and it happened to be in a hallway.
Mass chaos.

[Reuben Owen]

earlier on a big red round...

me as a elite runner, along with a elite hunter and another elite runner were hanging out near lambda, killing hosts who go near as it had been previously overrun, xenos were about to lose, less then 10 left

most of the weeds are gone as the other runner gets put into crit, so I drag her to literally the only weed square visible left in the area and stand guard as she heals

if you're not aware, runners can take an obnoxiously long time to heal out of crit
so me and hunter killed over 7 hosts over 10+ mins who kept trying to get the runner while she sat there in crit, eventually multiple dudes + 1 with a flamethrower + smartgun came and we fucking bailed, I had to drag the still crit runner 100 or so squares away as hunter held them off... so we guarded her at the new spot, killing 2 more until she woke up saying "thanks" and then 10 seconds later she got killed by a shotgun

like DAMN

[notasyndie]

earlier on a big red round...

me as a elite runner, along with a elite hunter and another elite runner were hanging out near lambda, killing hosts who go near as it had been previously overrun, xenos were about to lose, less then 10 left

most of the weeds are gone as the other runner gets put into crit, so I drag her to literally the only weed square visible left in the area and stand guard as she heals

if you're not aware, runners can take an obnoxiously long time to heal out of crit
so me and hunter killed over 7 hosts over 10+ mins who kept trying to get the runner while she sat there in crit, eventually multiple dudes + 1 with a flamethrower + smartgun came and we fucking bailed, I had to drag the still crit runner 100 or so squares away as hunter held them off... so we guarded her at the new spot, killing 2 more until she woke up saying "thanks" and then 10 seconds later she got killed by a shotgun

like DAMN

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=soKdNUBVDlc

[AverageSpitter]

>Be me
>Le Mature Praetorian
>Spitting at nerds and shit
>These pheromones are some good shit
>Sudden marine push
>Get a nade thrown at me
>OHSHIT.jpg
>Get stunned
>I'mFuckingDead.exe
>Mature Crusher rushes in
>He fucking saves my ass
>Marines still pushing
>We have to do a run for it
>Accidentally bodyblock the crusher
>Watch him fall in crit because of me
>Try to pull him
>Not fast enough
>He's dead, Jim.

SORRY ABOUT THAT 910, I AM REALLY FUCKING SORRY

[Renomaki]

I just recently had me a xeno round where I was a sentinel on Ice.

When I wasn't guarding SSD hosts, I was spending a lot of time in the pipes doing recon. Turns out they make for great scouting, because I am able to cover the majority of the colony with ease while the marines are non the wiser. I was able to gather so much information during my time in those pipes, but at one point, I came across an interesting opportunity...

Near the hanger elevator, A smartgunner stood watch diligently. He was unmoving, smartgun at the ready as he watched that elevator door all alone, with no one within shouting distance. I only intended to spy on the marines, but after doing a quick inspection, I realized that if I played my cards right, I'd be able to take out a smartgunner. It was a big risk, I coulda died, but I decided to go forward with it.

So, quietly, I prepared to pop out of the vent. He was but 2 tiles away from it, so I was within spit range. The very moment I crawled out, I quickly stunned him down and began to maul him like my life depended on it, thrashing at his arm while he desperately tried to call out for help, but I don't think he was fast enough. The moment his arm popped off, I quickly slid back into the vents, leaving no evidence of my being there as his friends came to save their now dead, armless smartgunner. He didn't even have time to turn around, let alone fire a shot.

And that was how I ninjaed a smartgunner to death.

[AverageSpitter]

I just recently had me a xeno round where I was a sentinel on Ice.

When I wasn't guarding SSD hosts, I was spending a lot of time in the pipes doing recon. Turns out they make for great scouting, because I am able to cover the majority of the colony with ease while the marines are non the wiser. I was able to gather so much information during my time in those pipes, but at one point, I came across an interesting opportunity...

Near the hanger elevator, A smartgunner stood watch diligently. He was unmoving, smartgun at the ready as he watched that elevator door all alone, with no one within shouting distance. I only intended to spy on the marines, but after doing a quick inspection, I realized that if I played my cards right, I'd be able to take out a smartgunner. It was a big risk, I coulda died, but I decided to go forward with it.

So, quietly, I prepared to pop out of the vent. He was but 2 tiles away from it, so I was within spit range. The very moment I crawled out, I quickly stunned him down and began to maul him like my life depended on it, thrashing at his arm while he desperately tried to call out for help, but I don't think he was fast enough. The moment his arm popped off, I quickly slid back into the vents, leaving no evidence of my being there as his friends came to save their now dead, armless smartgunner. He didn't even have time to turn around, let alone fire a shot.

And that was how I ninjaed a smartgunner to death.

Damn, that sounds pretty good, i remember i went through something a bit similar, but as an spitter, I was scouting with a hunter and for some reason the spec wandered off, As i saw the hunter get out of vents and get into position, i rolled with it and decided to help him. At the moment hunter pounced him, i spat acid at him twice, and started slashing the shit out of him as i switched to neurotox to keep him down, Got to crit him but he managed to survive because the help managed to get to the place just in time and the spec armor is pretty good

(The hunter fucked up and died, i shat on myself, ran away while spitting at them, and fleed through a vent)

[Weaselburg]

One Sentinal and one Runner were "Exiled" to the "Shadow realm" (Glitched) Hilarity follows with conversations about drifting through the void and all that Jazz.

[Renomaki]

Recently, I had the pleasure to finally play queen after more than a month of not playing xeno (way too many roles to dabble and catch up on as is on the marine side). Been wanting to try the queen for awhile now, and I finally got lucky and got to play her on Prison station.

And I gotta say, I felt real proud of myself. I raised a very strong hive and took great care of them during my rule, watching them grow and mature into battle-hardened warriors, successfully fighting off marines on 2 fronts and slowly expanding all the way to the marine's main FoB. I didn't even have to leave my nesting spot for the majority of the fight, simply focusing on leading and tending to the wounds of my swarm as they get hurt, keeping as many xenos alive as possible.

As the round continued further and further, I couldn't help but become a tad over protective and motherly towards my swarm, a sense of pride coming over me as I watched my warriors grow stronger and stronger under my leadership. However, this very motherly instinct would be my downfall during the final push.

After having sat in my cozy "throne room" for so long, I was called into action by my swarm for aid in the final push. At this point I was an Elite Empress, so I was a pretty tough cookie for the most part. After I helped to breach a flank, I attempted several charges with my swarm in an attempt to overwhelm the remaining defenders. But during one of these attacks, I witnessed one of my Praes fall over, and for whatever reason, I rushed to their aid, foolishly exposing myself as I desperately tried to save them. I got riddled with bullets and blown up with a grenade, which killed me so fast that even Dchat was baffled.

And so, while I sadly died before witnessing victory, I died with my praetorian in my motherly arms, just wanting to keep them safe.

... Later on in death, while checking the "follow Xeno" tab, I discovered that the majority of xenos that survived after taking the Space Station happened to be made up of mostly elites and Ancients. At least 3 Ancient hunters were present and 2 elite crushers. That both baffled and amazed me.

[Reuben Owen]

I witnessed one of my Praes fall over, and for whatever reason, I rushed to their aid, foolishly exposing myself as I desperately tried to save them.

it was love
;_;

[Dragoon47]

► Show Spoiler

I just recently had me a xeno round where I was a sentinel on Ice.

When I wasn't guarding SSD hosts, I was spending a lot of time in the pipes doing recon. Turns out they make for great scouting, because I am able to cover the majority of the colony with ease while the marines are non the wiser. I was able to gather so much information during my time in those pipes, but at one point, I came across an interesting opportunity...

Near the hanger elevator, A smartgunner stood watch diligently. He was unmoving, smartgun at the ready as he watched that elevator door all alone, with no one within shouting distance. I only intended to spy on the marines, but after doing a quick inspection, I realized that if I played my cards right, I'd be able to take out a smartgunner. It was a big risk, I coulda died, but I decided to go forward with it.

So, quietly, I prepared to pop out of the vent. He was but 2 tiles away from it, so I was within spit range. The very moment I crawled out, I quickly stunned him down and began to maul him like my life depended on it, thrashing at his arm while he desperately tried to call out for help, but I don't think he was fast enough. The moment his arm popped off, I quickly slid back into the vents, leaving no evidence of my being there as his friends came to save their now dead, armless smartgunner. He didn't even have time to turn around, let alone fire a shot.

And that was how I ninjaed a smartgunner to death.

If, on that round, the benos had just taken out a lot of Deltas and Charlies further in...

Youmonster.

I was a runner on prison recently, and went into crit about seven times in a row, and the last three, a boiler dragged me back to weeds. An incendiary bomb went off on the boiler, as well as a rocket, and he went into crit, prompting a sentinel and a hunter or two to go in and save him, but then ANOTHER bomb came down, gibbed the boiler, and crit the others in the still-burning flames...

I only managed to get one out, and it made me sad.

[Weaselburg]

If, on that round, the benos had just taken out a lot of Deltas and Charlies further in...

Youmonster.

I was a runner on prison recently, and went into crit about seven times in a row, and the last three, a boiler dragged me back to weeds. An incendiary bomb went off on the boiler, as well as a rocket, and he went into crit, prompting a sentinel and a hunter or two to go in and save him, but then ANOTHER bomb came down, gibbed the boiler, and crit the others in the still-burning flames...

I only managed to get one out, and it made me sad.

The Hive mourns.

[Vampmare]

Evolved all the way to Ravager on Big-Red, we were attacking Medbay when I heard the good old *bip bip bip*.

10 minutes later I pop as a new xeno.

1 hour later and I'm Ravager again now assaulting FOB, hear *bip bip bip* and faintly from the horizon it plays "Hello darknes, my old friend."

10 minutes later and I decide to turn xeno pref off cause I'm bald as hell.

[Tornadium]

The Ancient Ravager, Praetorian and Boiler dream team.

By far the most fun round I've ever played. Between us we killed over 120 marines turned a 1 hour marine major into a 5 hour xenos major.

Storming the dropship and butchering every living thing on the ship was an incredible end to the round.

[AverageSpitter]

The Ancient Ravager, Praetorian and Boiler dream team.

By far the most fun round I've ever played. Between us we killed over 120 marines turned a 1 hour marine major into a 5 hour xenos major.

Storming the dropship and butchering every living thing on the ship was an incredible end to the round.

>Ancient Ravager with Prae's very strong frenzy pheromone and ancient boiler's acid spray.

HOLY FUCK I CAN PICTURE THE SLAUGHTER IN MY MIND. Poor marines lmao

[HKO20006]

► Show Spoiler

The Ancient Ravager, Praetorian and Boiler dream team.

By far the most fun round I've ever played. Between us we killed over 120 marines turned a 1 hour marine major into a 5 hour xenos major.

Storming the dropship and butchering every living thing on the ship was an incredible end to the round.

The push (and the failure to retreat) that cost marines the round, at 15:00.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vIggIQzBIg

[AverageSpitter]

The push (and the failure to retreat) that cost marines the round, at 15:00.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vIggIQzBIg

>Video unavailable

RIP, I wanted to see that

[HKO20006]

Should work now

[Dolth]

Sad story:

Long story short, I was elite or ancient hunter last alien on Almayer, killing marines one by one in maints with tackle pull slash.

Then Feweh spawns his predator with his cape, teams up with marines, then plasma caste my ass so marines shoot me down while I was stun.

That was very sad, but which part of that story is the saddest?

[AverageSpitter]

Sad story:

Long story short, I was elite or ancient hunter last alien on Almayer, killing marines one by one in maints with tackle pull slash.

Then Feweh spawns his predator with his cape, teams up with marines, then plasma caste my ass so marines shoot me down while I was stun.

That was very sad, but which part of that story is the saddest?

HOW'S MY NUMBER ONE HUNTER!?

[Dolth]

HOW'S MY NUMBER ONE HUNTER!?

Salty, but karma is served.