The story is intended for a mature audience. The author is not liable for any mental damage caused by reading this.
You have been warned
The Prologue
► Show Spoiler
The time was 12:28 and the arrivals shuttle was two minutes from Nanotrasen Science Station 13. My grey jumpsuit was uncomfortably tight. I needed to get some better clothes as soon as I arrived. The crew had separated into groups. My fellow assistant were discussing where to get insulated gloves. The engineers were discussing the engine. The doctors were talking about Space AIDS. The scientists were discussing mechs. The only person other than myself who was not in a group, was the captain. The Captain was sitting at the edge of the shuttle, looking out into space. I walked up and tapped the captain on the shoulder, he turned and looked at me. Before I could ask my question a security officer had bashed me in the chest with a disabled stun baton. I fell to my knees in pain, as the officer slapped cuffs on me.
"How dare you assault the captain you syndicate scum?!"
I spat blood as I responded
"Shitcurity?!"
My response only angered the officer, he smashed his baton into my cheek. This was blatant police brutality but none of the other officers cared, they just watched and snickered. Finally the Captain stood up, here it comes I thought another autistic captain who is going to sentence me to the Gulag.
"Stand down officer"
A hush came over the shuttle apparently everybody was as surprised as I was. A reasonable captain was unheard of, something fishy was going on. The officer reluctantly removed my cuffs and walked away. The captain came over and pulled me back to my feet. A doctor came over and began fixing my wounds. Finally the shuttle arrived, and we all saw that this was not going to be a normal shift. We all stepped off the shuttle into the strange station, a hard rock like substance covered the walls, and was heaped in piles everywhere. The chef grabbed some of the white substance and declared
"It is salt"
At this point the captain stepped forward. The captain removed his security gas mask, revealing a hot pink goatee. He proudly declared
"My name is Feweh, Welcome to my station!"
End Prologue
"How dare you assault the captain you syndicate scum?!"
I spat blood as I responded
"Shitcurity?!"
My response only angered the officer, he smashed his baton into my cheek. This was blatant police brutality but none of the other officers cared, they just watched and snickered. Finally the Captain stood up, here it comes I thought another autistic captain who is going to sentence me to the Gulag.
"Stand down officer"
A hush came over the shuttle apparently everybody was as surprised as I was. A reasonable captain was unheard of, something fishy was going on. The officer reluctantly removed my cuffs and walked away. The captain came over and pulled me back to my feet. A doctor came over and began fixing my wounds. Finally the shuttle arrived, and we all saw that this was not going to be a normal shift. We all stepped off the shuttle into the strange station, a hard rock like substance covered the walls, and was heaped in piles everywhere. The chef grabbed some of the white substance and declared
"It is salt"
At this point the captain stepped forward. The captain removed his security gas mask, revealing a hot pink goatee. He proudly declared
"My name is Feweh, Welcome to my station!"
End Prologue
► Show Spoiler
The crew was understandably confused. This station was unlike anything they had ever seen. Salt was piled to the roof, and there were bitches everywhere. What was the purpose of this? As soon as the initial confusion passed, most of the crew decided there must be some purpose to this. Most of them not wanting to risk there jobs proceeded to their places of work. As I walked through the halls I found many strange things. Buried in the piles of salt were hundreds of papers, most of them labelled as an appeal of some sort. Most of these appeals were marked with a red "X" and salt seemed to be falling off of them. I had seen some weird stuff in my career, Space Wizards, Giant sentient blobs, even the devil himself. But never had I seen papers that created salt. Something weird was happening on Feweh Station and I was going to find out what. I went towards the dorms, I needed to get some clothes that fit. I found the selection rather picked over, but managed to get a tank top, some camouflaged jeans, and jackboots. I finished getting dressed, and was walking towards engineering when I heard commotion coming from security. I ran towards the brig the closer I got the higher the piles of salt became. When I finally arrived the salt was piled up to my waist. The doors were blocked open by a massive amount of salt, so I was able to enter. I entered the brig and what I saw was bizarre. The clown sat cuffed to a chair. Feweh was standing in the middle of the hall, with his arms crossed. What made s strange was the security officer. The officer was on his knees with ethereal chains rapped around his arms. The chains seemed to come from the ground. I stayed hidden listening to the conversation. Feweh was interrogating the officer.
"Why did you ignore the standard brig procedure?"
"What do you mean ignored the procedure, what did I do?"
"You left the brig empty, while a prisoner was being held!"
"Yeah I heard shots and stepped outside to see what is was"
"Does brig procedure say that an officer must be present whenever a prisoner is getting held?"
"Well yes but..."
"Does it state an officer must investigate every sound he hears"
"No but sir..."
"I have heard enough, you are hereby banned for 1 week, you may appeal if you wish"
The chains loosened and the officer lunged forward to attack Feweh, but just before his fist made contact the chains pulled tight. A red light flashed and where the officer had stood moments ago, there was a life like statue of him. Feweh stepped forward a pushed the statue, it crumbled into a pile of salt. Sitting on top of the pile was a paper. Feweh briefly skimmed the paper before stamping it was a large red "X". Salt began falling from the paper, and Feweh left it on the ground. I ran as fast as I could back to the dorms, I prayed that Feweh had not seen me. Just when I was sure I had evaded him, I rounded a corner and saw him standing in front of me.
"Going somewhere?
"Why did you ignore the standard brig procedure?"
"What do you mean ignored the procedure, what did I do?"
"You left the brig empty, while a prisoner was being held!"
"Yeah I heard shots and stepped outside to see what is was"
"Does brig procedure say that an officer must be present whenever a prisoner is getting held?"
"Well yes but..."
"Does it state an officer must investigate every sound he hears"
"No but sir..."
"I have heard enough, you are hereby banned for 1 week, you may appeal if you wish"
The chains loosened and the officer lunged forward to attack Feweh, but just before his fist made contact the chains pulled tight. A red light flashed and where the officer had stood moments ago, there was a life like statue of him. Feweh stepped forward a pushed the statue, it crumbled into a pile of salt. Sitting on top of the pile was a paper. Feweh briefly skimmed the paper before stamping it was a large red "X". Salt began falling from the paper, and Feweh left it on the ground. I ran as fast as I could back to the dorms, I prayed that Feweh had not seen me. Just when I was sure I had evaded him, I rounded a corner and saw him standing in front of me.
"Going somewhere?
► Show Spoiler
"Going somewhere"
All I could do was stutter out a response
"N-no sir"
"Well good"
Feweh walked away. I was relieved, I feared what he might do if he had known I had seen him. With all the excitement I decided to go take a nap. The piles of salt were especially high in the dorms.
All I could do was stutter out a response
"N-no sir"
"Well good"
Feweh walked away. I was relieved, I feared what he might do if he had known I had seen him. With all the excitement I decided to go take a nap. The piles of salt were especially high in the dorms.
I have no hate towards Feweh or any of the staff. I think they are all wonderful, and are doing their best to maintain a strong and healthy community. This story if purely for laughs and satire.
