Bridge Officer Jack Kirby ran into the bridge, to check in with the acting commander.
" Sir, shall I awaken the marines from Cyro sleep so we can answer the distress beacon on the planet? "
The commander spun around in his chair made of acid and chitin, and with his red hoodie and green camo pants snug around his frame, he replied.
" Yes. Awake the tallhost---I mean marines. From their sleep in their nest----I mean Cyro Pods. Yes."
Bridge Officer Jack Kirby, like the rest of the crew of the Sulaco----did not flinch at the strange way the CO spoke. For like everyone else, they did not see through his clever disguise.
" Alright commander, I'll go wake them all up! Yuk yuk yuk! "
The message spoke over the comms of the Sulaco, as the Cyro Sleep ended and the crew was awakened!
" All hands! Commander Zeen Oh is on deck! "
Hunter Thames twiddled with his cigar as he sat beside of Alan Kowaski in briefing. Both of the excellent SL's waited for their acting commander to appear and give them orders.
The lopsided CL Pierre 'Gulag' Martin smirked, the interest of Weyland-Yutani in his heart and mind, as Zeen Oh emerged. Acid dripping from his maw on the glass below, as he looked out to the marines and prepared to speak...
Lifting his tail and pressing it on the button that allowed him to speak with the megaphone, he started his speech. None of the marines noticing at all he had a tail, or was using it as a limb right in front of the crew.
" We have received a distress signal from the Hivemind---I mean the colonist. They have been attacked. By....wildlife. Yeah that. Go down and breed us new sisters---which is of course slang. " He paused, trying to think how to talk like a tallhost. He forgot for a second. " Slang for Alpha and Bravo to go stand in front of North Hydro with no weapons and facing the building, not looking at the fog---this will help you all get uh, adjusted to the air. " He thought for a second, did that make any sense?
Nobody in the audience seemed to notice the stupid order. They were too busy screaming and shouting medic, as a few MP's stunned and tackled a guy who showed up to briefing in his underwear with the fierceness of attacking someone who admitted to being in Al-Qaeda.
Excellent, he could continue with his orders.
" Charlie, go to engineering. And destroy the generators so we don't get too distracted with fancy power. Need to get one with nature. "
The Charlie SL, Rocco "Blackhole" Ward didn't flinch. He just nodded and understood, while the Charlie comms blew up with things like " Get to briefing, oh my god." and " Are you REALLY gonna brig me for being in my underwear?" They didn't notice a thing.
Zeen Oh turned his head, and looked at the Delta SL. His name was Rick Rhee, and while handsome---he was dumb as a bag of rocks. He was the leader of the Deltards, after all.
Zeen Oh hissed the orders, as the acid that dripped from his maw was literally burning a hole in the floor below him. " Delta, go to Nexus and tear down all the glass and grills. Make sure you don't have any trouble coming and going as much as you want, and if you see black weeds? Er, water them. "
Rick Rhee nodded, and looked like he was too busy trying to jam as many Shotgun slugs into his pockets as possible. He wasn't even carrying a shotgun. Some people in these corps were just obsessed with hoarding ammo.
" Excellent, tallhost. I mean, marines. You all have your orders. Now go board the metal bird and egg."
Commander Zeen Oh realized he just called those things by their Xeno terms. But the marines didn't notice. They were too busy pushing eachother and dragging eachother back as they raced to get on the ground and shoot things.
Good thing these marines were so incompetent.
Zeen Oh turned then, and walked through his tunnel back into the Bridge. Where he sat down and looked at his brilliant Bridge Officers. Jack Kirby and Nyxia 'Fifty' Cals. they were giving orders and directing all 4 squads, as the communications were filled with things like " fuck command." and " Lets mutiny, Command won't send a crate full of Sadars for my squad."
But Zeen Oh tuned it all out. For he had another thing on his mind. Or rather, his HIVEMIND. The Queen on the planet below spoke through the inter-connected minds of aliens.
" Did the mission go as planned, sister?"
Zeen Oh leaned back in his chair. His chair of chitin and acid. And they looked through the windows of space. Grinning.
" Yes....they don't expect a thing."
Time passed. An hour.
The fog lifted, and the aliens ran across the river to assault their easy prey---
----As all four squads stood there, and started blasting. They pushed across the river and as they backed the Queen up into the NW caves, the Queen spoke through the hivemind!
" What happened number Zeen (0)?! I thought you had made them easy prey to breed new sisters?!" "
Zeen Oh/ Zeen (0) slowly rose out of his chair of chitin and acid, and looked towards the stars.
" There is only room for one Queen, my sister. "
The sounds of gunfire and ear-guttering roars were sent through the hivemind, as the Queen was slain.
Zeen Oh, still in disguise and not suspected at all.....lifted his finger and pressed the M.O.T.H.E.R S.T.A.T.U.S U.P.D.A.T.E button.
And in his low raspy voice, he spoke to them all----who still somehow didn't expect a thing.
" GoD! HAs a HaRD oN FoR {b] Marines! beCaUSE wE KiLl! EverYTHING We sEE! "
In this timeline, there was victory.
How many times though, had they been here before?
How many resets, stuck in this time loop?
...And in them all, did they realize?
There truly is no, CO?
...But just another venomous reptilian, trying to lead them all to their deaths or secure their own safety?
The Marine Corps may never know.
