Story of a Saulth Kind - Manhunt

[Desolane900]

Happened earlier tonight in a rando round.

>be me
>round starts
>go to RO
>MP goes SSD
>wanting his holster
>strip him and take it in front of everyone
>run off with zero fucks given for naked MP in line
>grab flashlight and bug MT for screwdriver
>MT is off in his own world and doesn't know I exist
>fuckthis.colonist
>bust into aft storage
>MT gives attitude about break in
>tell MT I'll kill him and his entire family over comms before Rasp departs
>sitting in fob with no SL
>bored shitless
>notices space cleaner
>OwO what's this
>quickly replace cleaner with water
>run around well populated fob spraying water
>a few nerds trying to make kitchen into functioning kitchen
>already fucked with them earlier by smacking chef in the head with a bat
>snipper riffle spec comes at me with peel
>2 other randos are already chasing me
>run to engineering
>meet rando number 1
>we'll call him Dicksuck
>Dicksuck notices me and fires off a shot at me and runs out
>PFC Dicksuck (Sulaco 149.5) "Saul is shooting at me!"
>uwot.m80
>rando 2 comes in on the right
>hunter comes in on the left
>shoot at hunter
>PFC Rando 2 (Sulaco 149.5) "Saul is shooting at me!"
>niqqerwhatareyoudoing.larva
>run out of engineering with rando 2 on my heels trying to blow me up
>chill in fob while 4 people are still alive trying to have my ass for din din
>bwoinked "some MT lied about you and you're also being a pain in my ass"
>explain situation that MT lied and this is light for my usual shitdickery
>third rando marine starts picking a fight with me
>throws 2 knives at me
>catch both and hide the second one
>dicksuck comes around and starts chucking kitchen knives at me
>catch and hide them while talking to moderator
>start getting pissy about the entire ordeal
>moderator fucks off
>"it's IC I'm logging"
>explain to dicksuck and rando 3 that I will kill them if they don't stop
>they stop reluctantly
>remember marines are north fighting xenus
>head north and fight xenus
>get hugged
>drone and hivelord guarding me
>drone chittering at me in xenuspeak
>"xenu I'm going to kill you if you don't fuck off"
>other captured marine is shitting himself
>stand up
>grab shotgun
>kill drone and hivelord
>"told you so"
>use newfound hugger invulnerability to wipe the floor with remaining xenus
>burst in front of medic
>watch marines win round
>trying to hold back tears of pride
>fail
>mfw fucked around for entire round and still won
>mfw sparking a manhunt
>mfw sparked a manhunt and still made it to round end

[YungCuz]

How do you manage to do these things

[Desolane900]

How do you manage to do these things

By being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

[northcote4]

Close encounters of a turd kind.

God damn it Saul.

[Martzin]

IM GONNA BLOW YOUR ASS UP SAUL

sincerely, rando 2

[Recounted]

Happened earlier tonight in a rando round.

>be me
>round starts
>go to RO
>MP goes SSD
>wanting his holster
>strip him and take it in front of everyone
>run off with zero fucks given for naked MP in line
>grab flashlight and bug MT for screwdriver
>MT is off in his own world and doesn't know I exist
>fuckthis.colonist
>bust into aft storage
>MT gives attitude about break in
>tell MT I'll kill him and his entire family over comms before Rasp departs
>sitting in fob with no SL
>bored shitless
>notices space cleaner
>OwO what's this
>quickly replace cleaner with water
>run around well populated fob spraying water
>a few nerds trying to make kitchen into functioning kitchen
>already fucked with them earlier by smacking chef in the head with a bat
>snipper riffle spec comes at me with peel
>2 other randos are already chasing me
>run to engineering
>meet rando number 1
>we'll call him Dicksuck
>Dicksuck notices me and fires off a shot at me and runs out
>PFC Dicksuck (Sulaco 149.5) "Saul is shooting at me!"
>uwot.m80
>rando 2 comes in on the right
>hunter comes in on the left
>shoot at hunter
>PFC Rando 2 (Sulaco 149.5) "Saul is shooting at me!"
>niqqerwhatareyoudoing.larva
>run out of engineering with rando 2 on my heels trying to blow me up
>chill in fob while 4 people are still alive trying to have my ass for din din
>bwoinked "some MT lied about you and you're also being a pain in my ass"
>explain situation that MT lied and this is light for my usual shitdickery
>third rando marine starts picking a fight with me
>throws 2 knives at me
>catch both and hide the second one
>dicksuck comes around and starts chucking kitchen knives at me
>catch and hide them while talking to moderator
>start getting pissy about the entire ordeal
>moderator fucks off
>"it's IC I'm logging"
>explain to dicksuck and rando 3 that I will kill them if they don't stop
>they stop reluctantly
>remember marines are north fighting xenus
>head north and fight xenus
>get hugged
>drone and hivelord guarding me
>drone chittering at me in xenuspeak
>"xenu I'm going to kill you if you don't fuck off"
>other captured marine is shitting himself
>stand up
>grab shotgun
>kill drone and hivelord
>"told you so"
>use newfound hugger invulnerability to wipe the floor with remaining xenus
>burst in front of medic
>watch marines win round
>trying to hold back tears of pride
>fail
>mfw fucked around for entire round and still won
>mfw sparking a manhunt
>mfw sparked a manhunt and still made it to round end

oh your saul? still a pussy for not accepting a fight in the nexus