Funny, Embarrassing, and General OMG Moments

[coolsurf6]

...

[Warnipple]

[Eenkogneeto]

This is ridiculous. You can not fit Queen (dead scrub shit fuck xeno) (get good) in this Microwave.

[completelynewguy]

[TopHatPenguin]

[ZDashe]

1 HIT KO CHARGE.

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Welcome to the club Jones.

[SagaSword]

#AlienRacism4ever

[Mattmaster77]

PFC Preston Wolfe says, "DAD"
John Rhodes talks into the marine bravo radio headset
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston asks, "Yes?"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Can i go to work with you?"
CPL Victor Danko [Sulaco (Med)] says, "MPs"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Once this is over, yes."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "No"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I mean can i go there"
You place Supply Manifest into the the disposal unit.
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "And play"
PFC James Wanderer [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Would someone please open the armory"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Sorry."
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg says, "Come on"
LCDR Nerissa Edwards [Charlie (XO)] says, "Rollcall"
CPL Victor Danko [Sulaco (Med)] says, "If you see that someone pulling wounded stun them hard"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "But it's too dangerous."
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg says, "Back to your squad"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "But cooommmmmmmeeeee onnnnnnn"
SGT Boris Kamerer [Charlie (Spc)] says, "What"
PFC Bjorn Ironsights [Charlie (Mar)] says, "Hello love."
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Sorry"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "But you will get hurt."
CPL Victor Danko [Sulaco (Med)] says, "Grab and drag wounded, dont pull"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Fine dad"
SGT Taylor Brooks [Req (CT)] exclaims, "Reporting!"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "And I don't want to see that happen."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I have another question dad"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston asks, "Yes?"
PFC Joseph Thornton-Wise asks, "Any chance of a grip and a red dot?"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Out of grips"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Can you buy me a toy and a hat?"
You hug Artyrial Loudain to make her feel better!
Artyrial Loudain hugs Carl 'Dad' Winston to make him feel better!
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Rasp down"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Yes"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "When it's voer."
PFC Artyrial Loudain says quietly, "Bipodd"
SGT Boris Kamerer [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Why"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Over."
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] asks, "Uhm... why?"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Ok when will it come"
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "To kill more"
LT Zhang Park [Req (BO)] asks, "Can we get more SL helmets?"
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "I told you not to."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "NO"
PFC Yan Rayall [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "We lost planet"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "BUY IT NOW"
SGT Boris Kamerer [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Ah, fake"
PFC Yan Rayall [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Rasp not fly"

ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Preston"
SSGT John Rhodes [Command (SL)] asks, "What is going on?"
SGT Boris Kamerer [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Pod here as well"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Don't be spoiled"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I WANT TO PLAY WITH A TOY"
LT Zhang Park [Command (BO)] asks, "How is LZ2 doing?"
PFC Artyrial Loudain says quietly, "Infact drop a nade launcher"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Good things come to those who wait."
PFC Denis Soares D'Angelo says, "Hey mate"
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "The LZ is comprimised... we're not moving the Rasputin without a good reason. L-Last time it was to save people..."
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Somene send it"
PFC Denis Soares D'Angelo says, "M41a ammo please"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DAD IN RO DOESNT WANT TO ORDER ME A TOY"
Preston Wolfe talks into the marine bravo radio headset
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "What type?>"
LT Zhang Park [Command (BO)] says, "Nexus has been overrun LZ1 is being lost"
PFC Denis Soares D'Angelo says, "M41a simple"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "But i have waiter 70 years"
PFC Denis Soares D'Angelo says, "6 please"

PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Can i get it now?"
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "LYNCH THE CE"
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Dude the entire lower hangar is full of cold N2 now"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "I'm sorry, but not right now."
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] asks, "What isn ot suicide?"
Frederic Archer [Sulaco (Rsr)] stammers, "It's n-n-not cold i-it's burning hot"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "That is what you always said"
Artyrial Loudain starts climbing onto the reinforced table!
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "You said this for 70 years"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "I know."
PFC Artyrial Loudain says, "I want outt please"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "But I have to save up monies."
You hug Artyrial Loudain to make her feel better!
You hug Artyrial Loudain to make her feel better!
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "So is that my new mommy?"
Artyrial Loudain hugs Carl 'Dad' Winston to make him feel better!
Artyrial Loudain hugs Carl 'Dad' Winston to make him feel better!
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Dying in morgue cold air"
You hug Artyrial Loudain to make her feel better!
Artyrial Loudain starts climbing onto the table!
Frederic Archer [Sulaco (Rsr)] stutters, "That i-idiot released g-gas from the c-core"
Miles Northey [Sulaco (MT)] says, "Whoever was the fuck that opened the N2 i will find you."
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Can she buy me a toy?"
Artyrial Loudain climbs onto the table!
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "She is a friend..."
Artyrial Loudain starts climbing onto the reinforced table!
PFC Larry McGroove [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Somebody fucking with the thermostat"
Artyrial Loudain climbs onto the reinforced table!
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Will she be new mommy soon?"
You stock the Armat Systems Attachments Vendor with a barrel charger
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "No son."
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "THE CE HAS HACKED ALL THE ENGINEERING DOORS WHAT THE FUCK"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad one more thing"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "She is with another man...."
PFC Talon Focell asks, "Got anything good for retaking the LZ?"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Why am i alone?"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Because mommy died giving birth to you."
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DAD COME BACK"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "IM SORRY"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "FATHER"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I missed you dad"
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "So this is it, were gonna sit here and do nothing"
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "THE FUCKER SPACED THE SM"
Miles Northey [Sulaco (MT)] says, "WE had to."
SGT Boris Kamerer [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "..."
Jay 'Xeno' Burns [Sulaco (MT)] says, "Yes we did, after it nearly melt down"
Miles Northey [Sulaco (MT)] says, "The thing was gonna overheat."
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Dad why did mommy die?"
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg [Sulaco (SL)] shouts, "Motherfucker!"
SGT Taylor Brooks says, "Hey RO."
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg [Sulaco (SL)] says, "Air in lower deck is fucked"
SGT Taylor Brooks says, "CE spaced the SM."
PFC James Wanderer [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "SOMEONE OPEN THE ARMORY PLEASE!!!"
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "I swear black holes are more reliable"
SGT Boris Kamerer [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Fucking scumbag, mutilate the corpse and throw it in space"
PFC Talon Focell says, "Thanks"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "HEY THAT IS MY DAD"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad i want more information"
SGT Boris Kamerer [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "CE brought N2 canister and opened it"
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg [Sulaco (SL)] says, "Air is funky"
Balto''Crunk''Dreg talks into the marine alpha leader radio headset
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston asks, "On what?"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "When will i get a brother or sister?"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "I dunno son."
PFC Preston Wolfe yells, "But i have no one to play with!"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "It take awile for a brother and sister to be made."
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg says, "Sniper mags I found"
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "I saw him open it dude"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "You can play with the other kids."
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Then he caught a bullet"
You put the M41A marksman magazine (10x24mm) into the M276 pattern ammo load rig.
PFC Talon Focell [Charlie (Mar)] asks, "So what's the plan charlie?"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad IM 70 YEARS OLD when will i get a sibling to play"
Jay 'Xeno' Burns [Sulaco (MT)] says, "Right, im siphoning all the air out, then replacing it"
Artyrial Loudain hugs Balto''Crunk''Dreg to make him feel better!
The ColMarTech automated armaments vendor has been hit by Carl 'Dad' Winston with the M42A marksman magazine (10x28mm Caseless).
SGT Boris Kamerer [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "No, i seen scumbag walking in pod along with N2 canister with myown eyes"
The ColMarTech automated armaments vendor has been hit by Carl 'Dad' Winston with the M41A marksman magazine (10x24mm).
PFC Talon Focell [Charlie (Mar)] asks, "We lost the LZs and need to retake them?"
You stock the the ColMarTech automated munition vendor with a M42A marksman magazine (10x28mm Caseless)
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DAD THERE ARE NO OTHER KIDS ON THIS CAMPING TRIP"
You stock the the ColMarTech automated munition vendor with a M42A marksman magazine (10x28mm Caseless)
Artyrial Loudain hugs Balto''Crunk''Dreg to make him feel better!
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "OK so"
PFC Artyrial Loudain says, "You must get the marksmen ammo"
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "How long will the air cycling take"
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg asks, "There be marksmen ammo?"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Yes."
PFC Artyrial Loudain says, "Yis"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "When will you finish work"
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "All fucking hell"
PFC Joseph Murta [Sulaco (Mar)] asks, "Is Command retarded?"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Soon son."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad"
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Command is fucking retarded"
Artyrial Loudain starts climbing onto the reinforced table!
PFC Osalaa Wooki [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Hopefully not."
PFC Joseph Murta [Sulaco (Mar)] asks, "Or do they have alzheimers or something?"
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "We need to abandon this mission"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Daaaaad"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "DAD I HAVE ANOTHER QUESTIO"
PFC Fulton Williamson says, "M37 stock and recoil comp"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston asks, "What is it son?"
SGT Taylor Brooks [Req (CT)] asks, "RO?"
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "So unless you call Cpt Kirk to beam us down, were done"
PFC Hope Steele [Sulaco (Mar)] stammers, "The hahNgAR a'PPe'ahrs tu be BreAtHAHBle'."
SGT Taylor Brooks [Req (CT)] asks, "Any way to force open lockers?"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Why is it always night?"
PFC Arken Vasnetsov [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Hangar bay is fine now."
PFC Fulton Williamson says, "Also a harness if you have"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Oh hey its your lady friend"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "HELLO LADY FRIEND"
PFC Talon Focell [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "If we can figure out where the hostiles are gathered we can use the other ship"
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg [Sulaco (SL)] says, "Gunfire"
Balto''Crunk''Dreg talks into the marine alpha leader radio headset
PFC Artyrial Loudain says, "I will punch you"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "HELLO"
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "340 Kelvin is breathable"
PFC Preston Wolfe waves.
PFC Hope Steele [Sulaco (Mar)] stutters, "LUca'tiuN?"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I heard you are married to some old man"
You hug Artyrial Loudain to make her feel better!
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Why dont you marry dad"
PFC Artyrial Loudain frowns.
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "So anyone launching this pod or not"
SGT Boris Kamerer [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "We better land on LZ 2 and start kicking their asses once again"
Jay 'Xeno' Burns [Sulaco (MT)] says, "Well im replacing air, so it should get better over time"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "And become my mommy?"
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Im in"
PFC Artyrial Loudain says, "Cause he's just as old."
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston whispers, "Just roll with it..."
Artyrial Loudain starts climbing onto the table!
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "But i want more siblings"
You hug Artyrial Loudain to make her feel better!
Artyrial Loudain climbs onto the table!
You hug Artyrial Loudain to make her feel better!
PFC Artyrial Loudain says, "Then adopt them"
You hug Artyrial Loudain to make her feel better!
You hug Artyrial Loudain to make her feel better!
Artyrial Loudain hugs Carl 'Dad' Winston to make him feel better!
Artyrial Loudain starts climbing onto the reinforced table!
Artyrial Loudain hugs Carl 'Dad' Winston to make him feel better!
You hug Artyrial Loudain to make her feel better!
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "What how"
LT Zhang Park [Command (BO)] asks, "PO are we using the rasputin?"
Artyrial Loudain hugs Carl 'Dad' Winston to make him feel better!
You hug Artyrial Loudain to make her feel better!
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg asks, "Because she is an independat woman who don't need no man in her life?"
Artyrial Loudain hugs Carl 'Dad' Winston to make him feel better!
Artyrial Loudain climbs onto the reinforced table!
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Ok everyone on the pod ladies time to kick ass"
Artyrial Loudain examines herself.
SSGT John Rhodes [Sulaco (SL)] says, "Not yet"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I though they came from cryopods"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "What is the autolathe for?"
SSGT Ray Dubi [Command (SL)] says, "Fuck em up"
LT Zhang Park [Command (BO)] asks, "How is LZ2?"
PFC Jessica Bailey [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Ahahahah"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "It's for making things son"
SSGT Ray Dubi [Command (SL)] says, "Not sure"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "You should go find your teacher"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Is that how you work dad?"
CPL Riley 'Ice' Holmes [Command] says, "Hey, um, not sure if I should have this frequency."
SSGT John Rhodes [Command (SL)] says, "We need a for LZ1 and two"
Balto''Crunk''Dreg has thrown the M44 magnum speed loader (.44).
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Command (PO)] exclaims, "Uhm. No idea. Might be horrible!"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "And go on a field trip."
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Can you make me a sibling with that?"
Balto''Crunk''Dreg has thrown the USCM meal ready to eat.
SSGT John Rhodes [Command (SL)] says, "Bomb"
Balto''Crunk''Dreg has been lashed in the chest with cable coil by Artyrial Loudain!
Balto''Crunk''Dreg has thrown the metal rod.
Balto''Crunk''Dreg has been lashed in the chest with cable coil by Artyrial Loudain!
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Actually."
You just said something, take a breath.
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Yes"
Frederic Archer [Sulaco (Rsr)] says, "It's more like facial sex"
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Pod full, send us down"
PFC Osalaa Wooki [Sulaco (Mar)] asks, "So uh.. can we get some orders around here?"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Here they are."
Artyrial Loudain has thrown the M3 sniper's smock.
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "EVERYONE IN THE SHIP DON´T LAUNCH IT"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad that is a bucket...."
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Orders are to kick ass and take names"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "No it isn't."
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "It's a baby."
PFC Sawyer Griffiths [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Go go go"
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "AND WHEN THE STUFF GOING BAD"
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg says, "Oh fur back pack"
SSGT Ray Dubi [Sulaco (SL)] says, "We are taking the pod"
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "GET ON IT"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "But it doesnt look like me"
PFC Sawyer Griffiths [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "LAUNCH"
Balto''Crunk''Dreg puts the M44 combat revolver into the M3 sniper's smock.
Dr. Ben 'Mister' Turkes [MedSci (Doc)] says, "Why is the morgue closed off"
PFC Artyrial Loudain says, "Pod"
PFC Artyrial Loudain says, "Oh no"
SSGT Ray Dubi [Sulaco (SL)] says, "Don't launch it yet"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Because it has a different mother."
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "SHUT UP"
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "Get on the pod. The Rasputin LZ is in not good shape..."
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "I am part bucket."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "So where is the mother"
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "Ray are you all right'"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "WHAT"
Dr. Aiden Newton [MedSci (Doc)] says, "BLAME SOME MT"
Dr. Austin Corbett [MedSci (Doc)] says, "N2 leak in the hangar i think"
SSGT Ray Dubi [Sulaco (SL)] says, "Yeah"
PFC James Wanderer [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "CO please come open the armory for me"
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg [Sulaco (SL)] exclaims, "ALl ge ton pod!"
PFC Sawyer Griffiths [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "LAUNCH THE DAMN SHIP NOW"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Where is bucket mommy then?"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Hey lady"
SGT Franz Krake [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "15 on pod launching"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Lady"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "She is in the autolathe."
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Are you my bucket mommy?"
Carl 'Dad' Winston points to the autolathe
PFC James Wanderer [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "REST IN PEACE"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Oh right"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "But i want REAL mom"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Sorry"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "But she will have to do."
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Dad can i ask you curious question?"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston asks, "Can you play with your brother now?"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "No dad this is important"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston asks, "What is it?"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "How are bucket babies made?"
LOOC: Taylor Brooks: 'dad'
LOOC: Taylor Brooks: ok
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "You see"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "You go to the autolathe"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "You press make a bucket"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "And bam"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Bucket babies."
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "Guys"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "But did bucket mommy agree to that?"
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "Who launched ship"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Yes son."
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "Are dumb"
CPL Paul Thorn [Sulaco (Med)] says, "I dont think emergency shutters are needed anymore"
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "Uhm. No one did."
Jay 'Xeno' Burns [Sulaco (MT)] says, "Looking at the power output, i think we can power the Sulaco for another 40 minuites"
PFC Ethan Malakay [Charlie (Mar)] stammers, "L-L-Like ur mom"
LT Zhang Park [Command (BO)] asks, "PO are you there?"
Preston Wolfe has thrown the bucket.
SSGT Ray Dubi [Sulaco (SL)] says, "Who launched the pod"
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Command (PO)] says, "Mhm. The Rasputin is still in the hangar."
SGT Taylor Brooks asks, "Why are you bald?"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Now go play with your brother."
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "Someone did"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad"
SSGT Ray Dubi [Command (SL)] says, "We are taking the pod"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston asks, "Yes?"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "My brother doesnt want to play"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "That is because it doesn't know how to"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "It doesnt talk you see"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad"
PFC Crush Zaun [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Me"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "You have to show him"
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "Not really"
Dr. Kira Fairbanks [MedSci (Doc)] says, "I opened our lower areas back up."
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "Uhm. Yes really."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I dont think its old enough to play with 70 year old sibling"
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "There are 6 people on that little ship"
SSGT Ray Dubi [Sulaco (SL)] says, "Everyone off the fucking pod"
LT Zhang Park [Req (BO)] asks, "Can you order more SL helmets or did we already get them?"
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Wow."
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "Who's shocked the bridge doors?"
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "Don´t lie"
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "You fucking cuck"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "It grows fast."
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "Uhm. Sir, a lot of marines got on the pod on their feet without taking a seat."
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston [Req (RO)] says, "No."
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "No."
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "There were far more than six."
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] says, "Comanders have cameras every where in ship"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "When will it grow up?"
Jay 'Xeno' Burns points to Requisition Form - Supermatter Core
PFC James Wanderer [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "CO Could you please come down here and let me into the armory"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I cant read"
LT Zhang Park [Engi (BO)] asks, "Egineering how is it going?"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Will you teach me?"
SGT Taylor Brooks claps, clearly unimpressed.
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Sorry"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Too busy son."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad i dont know what this says"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "BUT"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Your teach knows"
PFC Arturo 'Flash Git' North [Sulaco] says, "We should call the pod back up for reinforcements"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad you are not doing anything"
Dr. Ben 'Mister' Turkes [MedSci (Doc)] says, "Hey we need more anestetic for surgury 1"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Your teacher knows."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad i dont have a teacher"
CPL Riley 'Ice' Holmes [Sulaco] says, "Joseph Thornton-Wise, I did not shoot you because I don't want to be arrested."
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] asks, "Seriously though, who thinks it's a good idea to nuke the planet?"
Jay 'Xeno' Burns [Engi (MT)] says, "((my spelling was so bad then))"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Yes you do."
LT Zhang Park [MedSci (BO)] asks, "Is there any more in the storage in OR2?"
Dr. Kira Fairbanks [MedSci (Doc)] says, "OR1 has anesthetic."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Im not old enough to go to school"
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "I certainly do."
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "He is in the same color of armor"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "That is why you took me to the camping trip"
SGT Easter Kelly [Sulaco (Spc)] says, "There's nothing there of worth anymore except extremely hostile wildlife"
Dr. Kira Fairbanks [MedSci (Doc)] says, "BOTH ORs have anesthetic."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad I DONT KNOW WHAT IS ARMOR"
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "Pod is here. It'll be going in two minutes."
PFC Bjorn Ironsights [Charlie (Mar)] shouts, "HELP IM IN THER KITCHEN !!!!"
Jay 'Xeno' Burns asks, "Hey carl, want me to entomb your son in metal?"
PFC Bjorn Ironsights [Charlie (Mar)] yells, "Help !!!!"
PFC James Wanderer [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "CO I NEED YOU TO OPEN THE ARMORY!!!"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad i will not give you this paper until you buy me a toy"
Jay 'Xeno' Burns has thrown Metal-Foam Grenade.
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "DA"
The solution begins to bubble.
The solution spews out a metalic foam!
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "D"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "HLEP"

Command Announcement


All able marines on the sulaco to the drop pod hanger


Jay 'Xeno' Burns says, "Hahaha"
PFC Arturo 'Flash Git' North [Charlie] says, "READY TO DEPLOY"
Archimus Kestrel [Sulaco (CMO)] exclaims, "HELP!"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DAD"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "IM STUCK"
PFC James Wanderer [Sulaco (Mar)] shouts, "CO before I go I need some gear from the armory!!!"
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
Jay 'Xeno' Burns smashes through the foamed metal.
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DAD I CANT SEE"
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
Jay 'Xeno' Burns says, "Hahahaaha"
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Thank you dad"
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
Dr. Ben 'Mister' Turkes [Sulaco (Doc)] says, "MP TO MEDICAL"
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "Pod dropping in about a minute."
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
Miles Northey [Sulaco (MT)] asks, "Who the hell used a metal foam grenade?"
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
PFC Arturo 'Flash Git' North [Sulaco] says, "PODS FULL"
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
You need a more secure grip to fire this weapon!
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad i think im hurt"
Jay 'Xeno' Burns says, "Father som bonding"
CDR Kiro Jones [Sulaco (CO)] asks, "Are you coming asistance?"
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
You smash through the foamed metal with the M41A pulse rifle MK2.
Dr. Ben 'Mister' Turkes [Sulaco (Doc)] says, "CODE BLACK ROGUE PATIENT WITH A GUN"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I think it hurt me"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "Dad why is it so dirty here on the boat?"
Preston Wolfe is buckled in to the roller bed by Carl 'Dad' Winston!
SSGT Ray Dubi [Command (SL)] says, "Command"
Archimus Kestrel collapses!
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Stay here son"
Ben 'Mister' Turkes cleans ugly flesh wound on Archimus Kestrel's chest and seals edges with bioglue.
Dr. Aiden Newton [Sulaco (Doc)] says, "WHOEVER THE FUCK EVEGENIJJ IS, YOUR SHIT IS IN MEDBAY"
Aiden Newton talks into the medical radio headset
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Hello MR newton"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Your doctor will heal you."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "This is my dad"

*leaves him at medbay*

PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DAD"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DAD"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DOCTOR IS HURTING ME"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "HE IS CHOKINGME"
SSGT Ray Dubi [Command (SL)] says, "We are down on the planet"
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg [Command (SL)] stutters, "F-F-Fucken"
PFC Andy Hueghs says, "Thanks"
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg [Command (SL)] stutters, "Th-Th-This be th-the end of m-my tale"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston [Sulaco (RO)] says, "Don't worry"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Don't worry"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DOCTOR DOESNT WANT TO TEACH ME ALGEBRA"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston [Sulaco (RO)] says, "The pain will be over."
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "The pain will be over."
Frederic Archer [Sulaco (Rsr)] says, "Lewd"
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Command (PO)] asks, "Uhm. How is the counter attack going?"
SSGT Ray Dubi [Command (SL)] says, "PO"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
You place the bucket into the the disposal unit.
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Command (PO)] asks, "Mhm?"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Im stuck"
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg [Command (SL)] stammers, "Send ship d-down"
SSGT Ray Dubi [Command (SL)] says, "Keep sending the pod back up and down"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Dad can you come help me please"
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Command (PO)] says, "That's what I have been doing, s-sir..."
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "I cannot see again"
CDR Nerissa Edwards [Command (XO)] says, "Alright"
SSGT Balto''Crunk''Dreg [Command (SL)] stutters, "We need a s-squad of marines via shuttle now"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DAD"
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Command (PO)] says, "But the Rasputin landing is covered..."
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "ITS WHITE NOW"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "I FEEL SLEEPY"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DAD I CAN BARELY WALK"
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DAD WHERE ARE YOU"
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "Marines to the Rasputin..."
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "COME PICK ME UP"
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "LZ2 needs backup apparently..."
PFC Preston Wolfe [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "DAD THEY ARE PUTTING ME IN SOME KIND OF MACHINE"

*Late joining CT comes in with Preston in wirecuffs*

PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "My hands hurt"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Keep him"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I dont want to be here anymore"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Where the boarding shuttle is."
SGT Taylor Brooks asks, "Keep him where?"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I want to go home"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Here"
SGT Taylor Brooks says, "Uh. It won't end good."
Jay 'Xeno' Burns [Engi (MT)] asks, "RO i ordered a new core did i not?"
LOOC: Taylor Brooks: uh no
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Up[ there"
LOOC: Taylor Brooks: greif is bad
Carl 'Dad' Winston points to External Airlock
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad"
LOOC: Carl 'Dad' Winston: It's not flushing.
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Its dark in there"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Im a good boy"
LOOC: Carl 'Dad' Winston: Nor gibbing.
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "You need to have a break son."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "I dont want to go to the naughty corner"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Go to sleep."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "But i already slept"

Command Announcement


This is a remider that the Pod LZ is secure and the Rasputin LZ is not. So get to the Pod.


PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Doctor tumblr put me to sleep"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "You need more sleep."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "But dad"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "No buts."
Dr. Kira Fairbanks [Sulaco (Doc)] says, "Losing power in medical."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Im old enough let me stay up late"
Preston Wolfe was unbuckled by Carl 'Dad' Winston!
Preston Wolfe is buckled in to the chair by Carl 'Dad' Winston!
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "DAAAAAAD IM 70 YEARS OLD let me stay uP"
SSGT John Hayter [Sulaco (MP)] says, "One of the Engineers is beating themselves up in the brig."
Dr. Ben 'Mister' Turkes [MedSci (Doc)] says, "Do we have more anestetic or do we need the ro to order some"
CDR Nerissa Edwards [Engi (XO)] says, "Engineers needed"
SGT Taylor Brooks says, "Just sleep."
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Now you are going to the naughty corner."
Jay 'Xeno' Burns [Sulaco (MT)] says, "That tends to happen"
SSGT John Hayter [Sulaco (MP)] says, "It's funny."
LT Zhang Park [Engi (BO)] asks, "Why are you being arrested?"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "For not accepting to sleep."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "DAD THIS CORNER IS TOO BIG"
SGT Taylor Brooks says, "Or there will be neurotoxins if you don't sleep."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "Dad"
PFC Preston Wolfe asks, "What are neurotoxins?"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "It helps you sleep."
SGT Taylor Brooks says, "They kill your brain."
Dr. Ben 'Mister' Turkes [MedSci (Doc)] says, "Ill tell em"
SGT Taylor Brooks says, "I mean it helps you"
SGT Taylor Brooks says, "To sleep."

*leave him in the corner, he eventually comes out*

PFC Preston Wolfe says, "YOU ARE THE WORST DAD"
Carl 'Dad' Winston has grabbed Preston Wolfe aggressively (now hands)!
Carl 'Dad' Winston is trying to put some cable restraints on Preston Wolfe
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] says, "Mhm... and sorry, ma;am. Really though he'd make it..."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "IM GOING TO"
PFC Kaleb Wheeler [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "I need to find delta squad"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "RUN AWAY FROM HOME"
PFC August W. Walker [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Anti tox and clonefix"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "AND NEVER EVER SEE YOU AGAIN"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "NEVER"
PFC August W. Walker [Sulaco (Mar)] says, "Works fine"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "YOU ARE BAD"
PFC Elias Ruben [Sulaco (Mar)] asks, "RO you there?"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "Fine son."
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "I won't stop you."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "YOU CAUSE MOMMYS DEATH"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "YOU DONT BUY ME TOYS"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "You are old enough to make your own decisions."
Dr. Austin Corbett [MedSci (Doc)] says, "Cryo is powered again"
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "AND YOU PUT ME IN NAUGHTY CORNER ON CAMPING TRIP"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "You killed your mother you little shit."
PFC Preston Wolfe says, "FUCK YOU DAD"
Carl 'Dad' Winston punched Preston Wolfe!
You are not supposed to go past the crumpled engineering tape...
You are not supposed to go past the crumpled engineering tape...
Carl 'Dad' Winston punched Preston Wolfe!
Dr. Ben 'Mister' Turkes [MedSci (Doc)] says, "Ive been here at teh brig and nobody has come to respond im heading back"
Carl 'Dad' Winston punched Preston Wolfe!
Carl 'Dad' Winston punched Preston Wolfe!
Preston Wolfe tried to punch Carl 'Dad' Winston!
Your armor softens the blow!
Preston Wolfe punched Carl 'Dad' Winston!
Your left leg hurts.
PFC Elias Ruben asks, "The fuck?"
Preston Wolfe attempted to disarm Carl 'Dad' Winston!
Carl 'Dad' Winston punched Preston Wolfe!
Preston Wolfe has disarmed Carl 'Dad' Winston!
CPL Evelina Kanaga says, "Need help?"
Carl 'Dad' Winston tried to punch Preston Wolfe!
PFC Elias Ruben says, "Fucking quit it."
Preston Wolfe has pushed Carl 'Dad' Winston!
PFC Elias Ruben says, "RO open up."
ENS Alkah Pha-dal [Sulaco (PO)] asks, "Uhm. How much longer, August?"
Evelina Kanaga starts climbing onto the reinforced table!
PFC Elias Ruben says, "We'll help."
Preston Wolfe fires the M41A pulse rifle MK2 (Wielded)!
You grab M41A pulse rifle MK2 with both hands.
Preston Wolfe fires the M41A pulse rifle MK2 (Wielded)!
Preston Wolfe fires the M41A pulse rifle MK2 (Wielded)!
You step on the glass shard!
Preston Wolfe fires the M41A pulse rifle MK2 (Wielded)!
Carl 'Dad' Winston fires the M41A pulse rifle MK2 (Wielded) point blank at Preston Wolfe!
You fire the M41A pulse rifle MK2 (Wielded)! 38/40
Preston Wolfe is hit by the rifle bullet in the eyes!
You hear a sickening cracking sound coming from Preston Wolfe's face.
Elias Ruben fires the M41A pulse rifle MK2 (Wielded)!
Preston Wolfe is hit by the rifle bullet in the chest!
Preston Wolfe starts climbing onto the table!
You hear a loud cracking sound coming from Preston Wolfe.
PFC Preston Wolfe screams!
You step on the glass shard!
You are now carrying M41A pulse rifle MK2 with one hand.
Elias Ruben fires the M41A pulse rifle MK2 (Wielded)!
Unknown (as Preston Wolfe) is hit by the rifle bullet in the chest!
You step on the glass shard!
Unknown (as Preston Wolfe) starts climbing onto the table!
Evelina Kanaga has thrown the USCM technician satchel.
PFC Max Knight says, "What the fyck"
PFC Elias Ruben asks, "THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?"
ENS Carl 'Dad' Winston says, "WHAT HAVE I DONE."

And just like that Preston got lynched by the other marines. And was never heard from again.

[SagaSword]

And just like that Preston got lynched by the other marines. And was never heard from again.

What a story, mark...What a story.

[YungCuz]

-snip-

I was there for that i was curious about what happened to preston since he sorta went silent.

[Shyguychizzy]

Indeed, when I came back after getting cloned a bunch and checking your RO I was wondering why there be only you.

[nerocavalier]

So survivors were bored and didn't feel like raiding crashed shuttle like any proper survivor would. Instead we broke into secure storage to hold up there (and definitely not because I wanted to prank call marines). It was mostly uneventful except for the time Skanhad stepped onto a mine that he planted and exploded. And well, the fact that a lizard showed up and the survivor left on watch, fell in love with her. Yes. Who wouldn't fall for the ruthless, killing machine that likely murdered all of your friends and loved ones. It's the perfect love story~

But alas, the whimsical nature of the lizard meant that she could leave him to dry at any moment. So as the loyal friends we are, we kidnapped the darling lizard and locked her up. What are friends for, after all? Good friends help you kill someone, best friends will help you hide the body, and bestest friends will help you kidnap your future waifu for marriage.



The mood was set, the atmosphere romantic, and the bullets loaded in case she disagreed to the wedding. She didn't by the way.

I was about to launch into a valiant speech about how I would fight it in glorious melee combat for wedding entertainment. Then out of the night showed up valiant hunters to rescue the fair, trapped maiden. They offered us a new mask to cover our faces in exchange for her freedom. We agreed and like the dutiful hosts we are, offered them bullets for their journey. They refused, we insisted strongly. Thus battle was joined.



Then marines showed up and the brave knights ran away faster than you could say "AY LMAO". But retreating, they were not. Nay, they were advancing in the opposite direction to plot to rescue their friend, sister, and comrade. And by the Empress, they would do it. But they took too long so marines shot the hell out of it, so it was pointless planning.

[NoahKirchner]

http://imgur.com/a/aG6bw All hail the healing powers of Fort Autismo, that at the very end of the round finally became pressurized. :D

[completelynewguy]

[completelynewguy]

Harry gets captured and nested in Medbay. Harry escapes and robusts the Elite Queen around the hour mark, plus a runner. He escapes to rescue Osaala Wooki... and to get bursted. He later gets cloned and encounters Ancient Hunter 374, who has been taking out marines who've tried taking it out. Quickfire, grip, and AP sure does work wonders.

► Show Spoiler

Here's to you, Cowper and Hunter 374
Robust baldies for-ever, here in our hearts
The last and final moment is yours
That salti-ness, is your triumph
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7oday_Fc-Gc
Note: This was made mid-round. PST 3:47.

[InterroLouis]

I actually hadn't even been nested yet. The Elite Empress was in the process of dragging me to the best when I woke up. And then chased me down while being sprayed with AP.

[Ogard]

[dylanstrategie]

Clean versions without chat and stretching

32x32 (default BYOND screenshot, unaltered) :



64x64 (nearest neighbour edit, equivalent to BYOND scaling) :



What you're seeing here are the results of Marines turtling LV Telecomms so hard that the Xenomorphs simply boarded the Rasputin, went up, trounced the ship crew, held a late briefing and went back down to finally kill them and seal an Alien Major

AKA why people tend to FOB Nexus instead of Telecomms. If the Xenomorphs are smart they can take over the Rasputin and go murder the ship while you desperately try to consider wherever to abandon the whole FOB over an alert or hold your ground hoping the Sulaco holds

[Renomaki]

Alas, if only LZ1 had more protection, then setting up an FoB elsewhere wouldn't be such a huge risk.

There is always the risk of aliens rushing the shuttle and cutting off all supplies for the marines down low, and if they aren't stopped, then it's time to post Badtime.jpeg.

[Warnipple]

Alas, if only LZ1 had more protection, then setting up an FoB elsewhere wouldn't be such a huge risk.

There is always the risk of aliens rushing the shuttle and cutting off all supplies for the marines down low, and if they aren't stopped, then it's time to post Badtime.jpeg.

The LZ is the pefect place to set up an FOB. People always move to the Center of Nexus though which should only be used as an 'outpost' type base.

[completelynewguy]

F

[Shyguychizzy]

Early round, I was behead as well as Leo Blackburn, later we both were stuffed in separate body bags with interesting tags.
(Don't have a good screenshotting system aswell as sorta new to posting pics)
Here is my body bag: ''That's a body bag- Baltor bolt gun" https://gyazo.com/262623be7173899be15c8b2f2947697b
Here be Leo Blackburns: ''That's a body bag- Dude with a big gun and a big dick. Probably still clonable" https://gyazo.com/c20aab24403deff96cd2e766eb99b0f7

[Warnipple]

Hugo doing field surgery it seems. Whelp, too late to catch now.

[Warnipple]

[Casany]

Welp, this just happened. we had a REALLY undermanned FOB in nexus, since most marines had died or been injured. we were covering north when a runner jumped out. we thought nothing of it and shot it some, it ran away. jumped again, so on so forth. then, while we were walking back towards the shuttle 12 aliens including the queen charged from the SOUTH. we had 7 marines overall, 3 of which were injured and 2 more were covering them. me and this other marine retreated to cargo where i was boxed in. he died to a crusher and i died killing a ravager. seconds later we lost LZ1. overall, it happened in 30 seconds