Funny, Embarrassing, and General OMG Moments

[UnknownMurder]

[johners12345]

If you ever want. PM me on skype for the rest

[UnknownMurder]

I'd be honored. PM'd you.

[Mac]

Damnit Johners I'm one of the older people on the server and that still made me laugh.

[johners12345]

Damnit Johners I'm one of the older people on the server and that still made me laugh.

lol really? Thats not even the worst

[johners12345]

Damnit Johners I'm one of the older people on the server and that still made me laugh.

I have decided to release the rest of the logs from that round.

Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas is having trouble keeping their eyes open.
Curtis Weeter shouts, "HES DIEING!"
Curtis Weeter exclaims, "CLEAR!"
Curtis Weeter places the defibrillator paddles on Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas's chest.
Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas has been touched by the defibrillator paddles by Curtis Weeter!
The emergency defibrillator is now off.
Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas says, "AHHH!"
Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas is having trouble keeping their eyes open.
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "CURT HOLY HELL"
Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas [Sulaco (Mar)] stutters, "THEY A-ARE F-F-FUCKING TORTURING ME!"
Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas [Sulaco (Mar)] stammers, "H-HOLY SH-SH-SHIT THIS H-HURTS!"


The Marine Combat Knife sticks in the wound!
You fire the stun revolver!
Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas is hit by the stun beam in the right leg!
Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas screams!
Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas slumps to the ground, too weak to continue fighting.
Curtis Weeter exclaims, "HOLY HELL~!"
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "ASSAULT"
Curtis Weeter exclaims, "DUDE STAND STILL!"
You attempt to get a good grip on the Marine Combat Knife in Sam 'Green' Greene's body.
Curtis Weeter yells, "I'MA GET IT!"
Curtis Weeter rips the Marine Combat Knife out of Sam 'Green' Greene's body.
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "AHHHHHHHHHHWWWWWWWWWWW"
Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas stammers, "I-I-I"
Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas stutters, "AM GOING T-T-TO G-GO"
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "WHY"
Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas stutters, "AND D-D-DO SHIT N-N-NOW"



Curtis Weeter shouts, "RUSSIAN ROULETTE!"
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "I didnt want you killing anyone"
Curtis Weeter sticks their gun in their mouth, ready to pull the trigger...
*click*
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "CURT NO"
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "JESUS"
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "WHY"
Curtis Weeter says, "TRICKED YA BITCHES"
Curtis Weeter says, "It's empty."
Tanya 'Aegis' Edenia laughs
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "Dont do that"
Tanya 'Aegis' Edenia says, "I was the one who emptied it"


Sam 'Green' Greene says, "Whats up"
Curtis Weeter sticks their gun in their mouth, ready to pull the trigger...
You are now resting
Curtis Weeter seizes up and falls limp, their eyes dead and lifeless...
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "CURT"
Curtis Weeter decided life was worth living
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "HOLY FUCK"
Sam 'Green' Greene [MP (MP)] says, "Curt... just put a bullet in his head"
Sam 'Green' Greene talks into the marine military police radio headset
Curtis Weeter shouts, "PSYCHE!"
You are now getting up
Curtis Weeter exclaims, "IMMORTAL BITCHES!"
Sam 'Green' Greene says, "Rot in there asshole"

I'd be honored. PM'd you.

incase you didn't see it on skype

[UnknownMurder]

[Inaf]

I'm pretty sure you can understand alien talk when asleep.

[Mitchs98]

I tottally drug Unk around as a turret last night, I mean he wanted me to so...aliens cut one of his feets off he wanted to keep fighting. I told him not to but eh he's stubborn. Drag him around, boom acid cloud to the face. We both survive and get on the dropship after I yell at him to come on, keep in mind more acid clouds kept coming.

Get back to the Sulaco, we both get surgery. He comes out yelling FREEDOM and saying he's going back down, me and Vera both tell him no, he grumbles says fine and walks away. Later, me Dino, and someone else kill a carrier that managed to get on board. At the time, Anya had evaded death twice and had had enough. The RO had suicided so she jacked the ID and got command to make her temp RO.

Little bit later, xenos board. Start welding vents and setting up girders. Carrier pops up, tries to throwing hugger through girder. I laugh inwardly, run to storage, girder it up, and head for the pods at the behest of my pai Helper. Not sure why...evac was never called. Pi places grilles literally everywhere. Pai gets the idea to talk to them, maybe get them to not kill us.

They said they'd spare the pAI, but the sentinel wanted me dead. It literally pointed at me and growled. Shuttle was overran before I could suicide, dunno why they didn't ley me, didn't try to hug me anyway.

*shrug* At-least the lipstick held up.

[UnknownMurder]

You can understand aliens as a Marine.

[johners12345]

LOOC: Anya Allen: LOL
LOOC: Anya Allen: Weeter slowly walks in..
Anya Allen says, "Hey Curtis"
Curtis Weeter says, "Sup babe."
LOOC: Curtis Weeter: This is gonna be a great shift.

get ready for humor
*proceeds to get in ro chair in a ripley*

Curtis Weeter asks, "Hi welcome to Space wendies How may I take your order?"
Anya Allen says, "...damnit Curtis."
Francis Marshall says, "Yeah gimme five burgers and a shake"
Curtis Weeter says, "Excellent choice sir."
Curtis Weeter says, "Now that will be five Fucks given"

Curtis Weeter asks, "WElcome to space mcdonalds how may I take your order?"
Charles Greenawalt says, "Thanks, Anya."
Anya Allen says, "Since Curtis insists on doing that to everyone.."
Charles Greenawalt says, "Shit, doesn't fit."
Anya Allen says, "Welp."
Charles Greenawalt asks, "Mind if I swap it out again?"
Anya Allen says, "Never used a smartgun myself, so I'm not sure what does."
Anya Allen says, "And sure."
Curtis Weeter asks, ".... Sir can you hear me properly?"
Curtis Weeter asks, "WELCOME TO SPACE MCDONALDS! HOW MAY I TAKE YOUR FLIPPING FUCKING ORDER!?"
Charles Greenawalt says, "Fifty freedom fries and Cuban Chips, please."
Anya Allen asks, "Why is everything about food to you?"
Anya Allen says, "Jeez.."
Curtis Weeter says, ".... We don't have any food"
Curtis Weeter says, "So .."
Curtis Weeter says, "Uh,.."
Melissa Wright says, "Yoyoyo."
Curtis Weeter says, "Fuck you."
Curtis Weeter yells, "WELCOME TO SPACE IHOP HOW MAY I TAKE YOUR TERRIBLE ORDER?!"

Alex Graves [Sulaco (Doc)] asks, "Curtis, you there?"
Alex Graves [Sulaco (Doc)] asks, "Curtis, come in, Curtis?"
Curtis Weeter [Sulaco (CT)] asks, "Ya need something alex?"
Anya Allen says, "Here, food, be happy"
The Warm Donk-pocket bounces off the armor.
Curtis Weeter says, "Nice day."
Curtis Weeter says, "Nice ass too"
Alex Graves [Sulaco (Doc)] says, "Space McDonalds called, they want your Fifty Freedom Fries and Cuban Chips."
Anya Allen says, "..."
Anya Allen says, "You're lucky your in that loader."
Curtis Weeter [Sulaco (CT)] says, "Nah. We are space Ihop Currently."

What is truly hilarious


Curtis Weeter says, "..> Bit of a dick too with that goatee but Eh."
Anya Allen says, "Now that I think about it..yea you don't seem dumb enough to eat food off the floor."
Curtis Weeter says, "I'm not necessarily dumb"
Curtis Weeter says, "I'm just ready to meet whatever the fuck is waiting for me."
Anya Allen says, "Oh right, you're 'special'."
Curtis Weeter says, "Funny."
Curtis Weeter says, "Thats what my doctor called me"
Anya Allen says, "I th-..."
Alex Graves says, "...I'm his Doctor, Anya."
Alex Graves says, "He's 'Special'."
Anya Allen says, "I.."
Anya Allen says, "Uh.."
Anya Allen says, "That's...both really hilarious and I feel bad at the same time.."
Curtis Weeter says, "Yeah.."

[UnknownMurder]

[Siserith Vassada]

>hears that north fob is under attack
>rushes to aid
>stabs three runnsers two spitters two hunters a prae a hivelord and a drone to death and stab the queen into crit
>predator is just sort of watching lobbing the occasional plasma bolt and giving the occasional silent cheer
>get facehugged
>gets free with help of pred
>goes back and finishes off queen one spitter another runner and another drone
>convinces marines to finish me off
>goes to sleep because it's two am

Halkarl or whatever your name is... y u no help.

[Jack McIntyre]

Because you were on a hunt, I was under honor code to let you fight, and thus I only tried to fire to keep the xenos out of the room you were fighting in. I actually was going to skin them if you killed them all, but I got face hugged and due to a certain queen who had kept their xenos on a pretty good leash, I got infected and thus had to die with honor why I did the little team up since figured you had to do the same . However I will say that round you did earn my respect by stabbing and killing two runners with your knife. Very well done and props by me especially since I am known for my knife fighting as a marine against the xenos. So got my respect from two people haha.

[Mitchs98]

LOOC: Anya Allen: LOL
LOOC: Anya Allen: Weeter slowly walks in..
Anya Allen says, "Hey Curtis"
Curtis Weeter says, "Sup babe."
LOOC: Curtis Weeter: This is gonna be a great shift.

get ready for humor
*proceeds to get in ro chair in a ripley*

Curtis Weeter asks, "Hi welcome to Space wendies How may I take your order?"
Anya Allen says, "...damnit Curtis."
Francis Marshall says, "Yeah gimme five burgers and a shake"
Curtis Weeter says, "Excellent choice sir."
Curtis Weeter says, "Now that will be five Fucks given"

Curtis Weeter asks, "WElcome to space mcdonalds how may I take your order?"
Charles Greenawalt says, "Thanks, Anya."
Anya Allen says, "Since Curtis insists on doing that to everyone.."
Charles Greenawalt says, "Shit, doesn't fit."
Anya Allen says, "Welp."
Charles Greenawalt asks, "Mind if I swap it out again?"
Anya Allen says, "Never used a smartgun myself, so I'm not sure what does."
Anya Allen says, "And sure."
Curtis Weeter asks, ".... Sir can you hear me properly?"
Curtis Weeter asks, "WELCOME TO SPACE MCDONALDS! HOW MAY I TAKE YOUR FLIPPING FUCKING ORDER!?"
Charles Greenawalt says, "Fifty freedom fries and Cuban Chips, please."
Anya Allen asks, "Why is everything about food to you?"
Anya Allen says, "Jeez.."
Curtis Weeter says, ".... We don't have any food"
Curtis Weeter says, "So .."
Curtis Weeter says, "Uh,.."
Melissa Wright says, "Yoyoyo."
Curtis Weeter says, "Fuck you."
Curtis Weeter yells, "WELCOME TO SPACE IHOP HOW MAY I TAKE YOUR TERRIBLE ORDER?!"

Alex Graves [Sulaco (Doc)] asks, "Curtis, you there?"
Alex Graves [Sulaco (Doc)] asks, "Curtis, come in, Curtis?"
Curtis Weeter [Sulaco (CT)] asks, "Ya need something alex?"
Anya Allen says, "Here, food, be happy"
The Warm Donk-pocket bounces off the armor.
Curtis Weeter says, "Nice day."
Curtis Weeter says, "Nice ass too"
Alex Graves [Sulaco (Doc)] says, "Space McDonalds called, they want your Fifty Freedom Fries and Cuban Chips."
Anya Allen says, "..."
Anya Allen says, "You're lucky your in that loader."
Curtis Weeter [Sulaco (CT)] says, "Nah. We are space Ihop Currently."

What is truly hilarious


Curtis Weeter says, "..> Bit of a dick too with that goatee but Eh."
Anya Allen says, "Now that I think about it..yea you don't seem dumb enough to eat food off the floor."
Curtis Weeter says, "I'm not necessarily dumb"
Curtis Weeter says, "I'm just ready to meet whatever the fuck is waiting for me."
Anya Allen says, "Oh right, you're 'special'."
Curtis Weeter says, "Funny."
Curtis Weeter says, "Thats what my doctor called me"
Anya Allen says, "I th-..."
Alex Graves says, "...I'm his Doctor, Anya."
Alex Graves says, "He's 'Special'."
Anya Allen says, "I.."
Anya Allen says, "Uh.."
Anya Allen says, "That's...both really hilarious and I feel bad at the same time.."
Curtis Weeter says, "Yeah.."

I'm honestly going to play station side jobs as Anya more, way more hilarity ensues...that round was literally epic.

[Bologna Prime]

I was the Liason, in lieu of any response from WY I decided to give myself the mission of retrieving the Colony Director's violin. That meaning I paid a marine to go fetch it.
It took a while, but eventually the marine Nathaniel showed up with it, apparently his squad died for it, oh well. Victory was mine. I had the message to WY written, surely they would pay attention to me now that I've proven myself!



no

► Show Spoiler

[Mitchs98]

I was the Liason, in lieu of any response from WY I decided to give myself the mission of retrieving the Colony Director's violin. That meaning I paid a marine to go fetch it.
It took a while, but eventually the marine (Nathaniel showed up with it, apparently his squad died for it, oh well. Victory was mine. I had the message to WY written, surely they would pay attention to me now that I've proven myself!



no

► Show Spoiler

See, the moment you wanted to retrieve a violin of all things, space jesus himself turned against you. That alien coming to kill you wasn't random chance or selection, no, that alien was sent by space jesus himself for crimes against humanity.

You could have let the violin get melted or abandoned, but no. You sought pride, and brought a plague like no other onto the Sulaco. You just couldn't be happy with your already cushy lifestyle, so you brought the wrath of space jesus down on you, the curse of the violin.

[johners12345]

John Tedrow says, "Ugh.."
Vera Dekker asks, "Jeke, you gonna make explosives for the marines?"
John Tedrow says, "W-what"
John Tedrow looks at his body
Vera Dekker says, "Put some pants on, Curtis"
John Tedrow asks, "Say what the hell!?"
Jeke McDonnal says, "I do not know how to do that"
Vera Dekker says, "Ah, gotcha"
Vera Dekker says, "Well, long story short, Curtis"
John Tedrow has thrown M3 Pattern Marine Armor.
John Tedrow has thrown the marine backpack.
Vera Dekker says, "You switched your body up in order to hit on Anya"
Jeke McDonnal climbs down the ladder!
Vera Dekker nods seriously.
John Tedrow says, "....."
John Tedrow says, "Right."
John Tedrow says, "That.."
Troy Macris yells, "HEY!"
John Tedrow says, "ACTUALLY sounds like something I Would do."
Troy Macris exclaims, "THAT'S NOT YOUR STUFF!"
Vera Dekker says, "Yup"

[Mitchs98]

Anya Allen: We made it!
Anya Allen: Maybe next time don't run directly at the big red aliens with claws Curtis?
John Tedrow(Aka Curtis once he went splat and had his head sewed on and cloned: It's called living Anya.
Anya Allen: It's called dying too.
John Tedrow: You're not living till you're dying.
Anya Allen sighs.
Anya Allen: Anyway...so..where are we going?
Bigby "Pyro" Farkas: Strip Club, say strip club.
John Tedrow: Paris Anya.
John Tedrow: Strip Club.
John Tedrow: Wait you meant us?
Anya Allen: Yea, I told you if we lived we'd go on a date didn't I? Also would have murdered you if you said strip club.
John Tedrow: I didn't think you were serious.
Anya Allen: Well..I was, where are we goin'?
John Tedrow: Paris.
Anya Allen: Neat, always wanted to go..

Pretty much how it went, typed this out, didn't have logs cause I'm on my phone. Curtis is definetely determined, making Paris the first date, lmao.

[Releasing]

DEAD: Melissa Wright says, "while i was down under i heard this"
DEAD: Melissa Wright says, "...You hear something about...ginger"
DEAD: Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas says, "OH FOR-"
DEAD: Nicholas Snyder says, "XD"
DEAD: Keiran Lawson says, "XD"
DEAD: Keiran Lawson says, "XDDDDD"
DEAD: Vera Dekker says, "Ayy lmao"
DEAD: Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas says, "FUCK SAKE"
DEAD: Nicholas Snyder says, "Get rekt jay!"
DEAD: Keiran Lawson says, "Love ya Bigs <3"
DEAD: Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas says, "EVEN IN DEATH I'M JUST THE FUCKING GINGER"

Bigs can never escape being called a ginger.

[Mitchs98]

DEAD: Melissa Wright says, "while i was down under i heard this"
DEAD: Melissa Wright says, "...You hear something about...ginger"
DEAD: Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas says, "OH FOR-"
DEAD: Nicholas Snyder says, "XD"
DEAD: Keiran Lawson says, "XD"
DEAD: Keiran Lawson says, "XDDDDD"
DEAD: Vera Dekker says, "Ayy lmao"
DEAD: Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas says, "FUCK SAKE"
DEAD: Nicholas Snyder says, "Get rekt jay!"
DEAD: Keiran Lawson says, "Love ya Bigs <3"
DEAD: Bigby ''Pyro'' Farkas says, "EVEN IN DEATH I'M JUST THE FUCKING GINGER"

Bigs can never escape being called a ginger.

The ginger is real. Although people call Anya ponytail and goldilocks..a lot..lol.

[Sargeantmuffinman]

Wasting points on useless stuff as the RO is quite stupid.

But funny.

[KeyWii]

He isn't responding to anything around him and seems to be asleep.
He does not appear to be breathing.
He has several bleeding deep ripped cuts, a cut, and a small scab on his head.
He has a ripped large burn, and a ripped burn on his right hand.
Unknown (as Keiran Lawson) has blood soaking through from under his clothing!
Isn't paid enough for this shit.

Flavor texts make the character.

[Mitchs98]

Curtis Weeter whispers: wanna bang?

Mfw.

[Mac]

Curtis Weeter whispers: wanna bang?

Mfw.

Johners is playing too much Lifeweb.