Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Generic, on-topic discussion about Colonial Marines.
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Crab_Spider
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Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Crab_Spider » 03 Apr 2017, 17:35

We all like to be reminded of just how stupid the logic of the SS13 AND CM mechanics are (Apop don't deny it. Some of these mechanics are just ass ridiculous! BODY BAGS can hold up to 15 helmets that are HUGE but not a XENO CORPSE?! What is this? The "Very Selective Magic Satchel that Chooses to Be Useless"?)

But when it comes to the effects of powergaming, which ignores RP, IRL logic, protocols an actual military would enforce should Military Law and Geneva Protocol be broken, and psychopathy the Marines will show when the mods barely give a shit [
implement my suggestion for making desecration of corpses a new Marine Law.
, there's a lot of shit to explain. Like why the Colonial Marines are allowing a civilian to have access to grenades, or why there's a tank transfer valve in his vender (this is the kind of sketchiness that makes you realize the USCM is run by idiots) or why there are welding tanks that don't just have extra shielding in the event of an accidental discharge.

When it comes down to it, what we do in an average round, win or lose, mostly for Marines, WILL have some consequences.


WRITE THOSE CONSEQUENCES DOWN
You will never be as bad as the baldie who picked up a tactical shotgun while a hunter was pouncing on top of a CMO for 4 seconds, with his only response being to pace around before being decap'd by said hunter. You are not Brett Kimple, and you never will be. You are not the reason why I regular MP.

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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Swagile » 03 Apr 2017, 17:53

You can survive a point blank grenade held in your hand and not break anything.
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Desolane900 » 03 Apr 2017, 18:07

The marines are much too overstocked with ammo. My immersion has been broken.
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Crab_Spider » 03 Apr 2017, 18:18

...
...
...
What?

I'm talking about scenarios that'd occur in the average CM round due to the Marines powergaming. Like a Mutiny. Once Hugh Command finds out the Marines killed their Bridge team, a majority of those involved would be execute and put in permanent solitary confinement.
You will never be as bad as the baldie who picked up a tactical shotgun while a hunter was pouncing on top of a CMO for 4 seconds, with his only response being to pace around before being decap'd by said hunter. You are not Brett Kimple, and you never will be. You are not the reason why I regular MP.

I am John "Buckshot" Rhodes, the Tactical Snowflake Hunter

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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by caleeb101 » 03 Apr 2017, 20:02

How about you bully xenos for once, eh!? Drones and Hivelords and Queens can make a wall, stand on that wall (really dumb scaling if a queen can stand on a bloody resin wall) and somehow not get hit by a single bullet because if you're on top of something, bullets can't git ye. Or how about the fact that crushers can easily drag people despite having no body parts that would allow it to do so other than its mouth. And Ravagers are like xenomorph t'rexes on their sprite.. how do they reach down and claw things? Do they just kick shit with foot claws? Same applies to nearly all T-3's. How does the queen know how to operate the consoles? Is she a top class hacker? Why didn't she just hack the server then? Surely she'd just think it was another light and slash the shit out of it? That's how xeno mains explained why they slash APC'S isn't it?
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by MrJJJ » 03 Apr 2017, 21:25

Marines, dragging, shooting and walking all at the same time, when did they evolve a tail?

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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by spicemoron » 04 Apr 2017, 00:59

I assume a scientist on a military vessel would be involved in the types of science that have military applications.


I mean the people working in an explosives factory aren't trained soldiers and that's what a researcher is.

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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by TheMaskedMan2 » 04 Apr 2017, 02:38

I don't think you guys are understanding the point of this threat, I believe what Crab is trying to say is how silly and unrealistic the game can be cause it's a videogame... so basically..

Ahem.

The fact that assaulting someone is punished with *gasp* 15 minutes in the brig with radio comms!

There are no quarantine procedures for marines potentially infected with a deadly virus, aka, hugger.

Why the ship needs a cargo transport as opposed to coming stocked with countless supplies in bulk.

Etc.
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Gumpson » 04 Apr 2017, 04:18

When we first land down the colony and everyone starts running off and doing their own thing

When people start randomly discharging their weapons into secure fully intact areas or lockers (despite not having sighted a single hostile/anomolous entity yet)to loot the items inside them

If Wey-yu hired a random platoon of marines and giving(!) them a FULLY built warship without even checking their possible past kleptomaniac tendencies then I just fully lose all hope of CL and wey-yu immersion
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by RedOktober12 » 04 Apr 2017, 06:03

That the marine corps tolerates the elaborate and flamboyant hairstyles of most female marines or the egregious facial hair of the males. To say nothing if the vomit inducing hair colours.

That the only marines that can be trusted are the aforementioned haired people. That those that follow uniform regulation are barely functional sub humans with no ability to distinguish friend from foe and a deep desire to wander alone in jungles.

That tofu is not a filling and wholesome meat substitute.
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Swagile » 04 Apr 2017, 11:06

RedOktober12 wrote:That the marine corps tolerates the elaborate and flamboyant hairstyles of most female marines or the egregious facial hair of the males. To say nothing if the vomit inducing hair colours.

That the only marines that can be trusted are the aforementioned haired people. That those that follow uniform regulation are barely functional sub humans with no ability to distinguish friend from foe and a deep desire to wander alone in jungles.

That tofu is not a filling and wholesome meat substitute.
This so much. Most weeabo haired marines are the most competent marines; I would trust them with my life.

One thing that bugs me is if the supply shuttle keeps coming with supplies every 2 minutes, why doesn't everyone just board the shuttle during Sulaco vs Xenos defense and escape via the Supply Shuttle? Its big, and it goes to some supply port.
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Crab_Spider » 04 Apr 2017, 11:41

Swagile wrote:This so much. Most weeabo haired marines are the most competent marines; I would trust them with my life.

One thing that bugs me is if the supply shuttle keeps coming with supplies every 2 minutes, why doesn't everyone just board the shuttle during Sulaco vs Xenos defense and escape via the Supply Shuttle? Its big, and it goes to some supply port.
The environment is too low pressured. If you don't have a suit built for that shit, you will die a slow, painful, and agonizing death. That's why there are hardsuits in the Tcomms room, if something goes wrong, or whoever fucks it up (this doesn't excuse WHY THERE'S ONLY ONE SUIT IN PLAIN SIGHT WITH NO KIND OF SECURITY IN THE EVENT SOMEONE BREAKS IN!) will have to reboot the machines manually, access the computers, and then input a passcode. The area the machines are in is low pressure.

Also, that shuttle wasn't built to carry humans, just cargo. If it were, there'd but some seats inside of it and a console to control where it goes. Remember, just because it's a shuttle doesn't make it safe to be used for live human transport.
You will never be as bad as the baldie who picked up a tactical shotgun while a hunter was pouncing on top of a CMO for 4 seconds, with his only response being to pace around before being decap'd by said hunter. You are not Brett Kimple, and you never will be. You are not the reason why I regular MP.

I am John "Buckshot" Rhodes, the Tactical Snowflake Hunter

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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Crab_Spider » 04 Apr 2017, 13:57

caleeb101 wrote:How about you bully xenos for once, eh!? Drones and Hivelords and Queens can make a wall, stand on that wall (really dumb scaling if a queen can stand on a bloody resin wall) and somehow not get hit by a single bullet because if you're on top of something, bullets can't git ye. Or how about the fact that crushers can easily drag people despite having no body parts that would allow it to do so other than its mouth. And Ravagers are like xenomorph t'rexes on their sprite.. how do they reach down and claw things? Do they just kick shit with foot claws? Same applies to nearly all T-3's. How does the queen know how to operate the consoles? Is she a top class hacker? Why didn't she just hack the server then? Surely she'd just think it was another light and slash the shit out of it? That's how xeno mains explained why they slash APC'S isn't it?
The Queen is telepathic and has been shown to be able to bend this ability to non-xenomorphs as well, telepathy is the ability to read and understand electrical signals (or thought) in the brain, this has been supported in many X-Men comics when Magneto is repeatedly established to be able to interrupt, block, create and even jam in on radio waves and telepathic conversations. His power of magnetism isn't limited to just magnetism, it waves over to the 3 other, less powerful fundamental forces of the universe. If my hypothesis serves correct, it's plausible the Queen is manipulating the console with a magnetic field she is unwittingly emitting to use the console, as she understands how those consoles work by having the xenos scout around it and through a couple of memories from the now deceased Marines, including SLs.

I slash APCs because it's emitting light and a grenade went off and when it exploded on the APC, everything shut off.
You will never be as bad as the baldie who picked up a tactical shotgun while a hunter was pouncing on top of a CMO for 4 seconds, with his only response being to pace around before being decap'd by said hunter. You are not Brett Kimple, and you never will be. You are not the reason why I regular MP.

I am John "Buckshot" Rhodes, the Tactical Snowflake Hunter

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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by 4thsurviver » 04 Apr 2017, 17:27

RedOktober12 wrote:That the marine corps tolerates the elaborate and flamboyant hairstyles of most female marines or the egregious facial hair of the males. To say nothing if the vomit inducing hair colours.

That the only marines that can be trusted are the aforementioned haired people. That those that follow uniform regulation are barely functional sub humans with no ability to distinguish friend from foe and a deep desire to wander alone in jungles.

That tofu is not a filling and wholesome meat substitute.
Well the Tofu is literally just a empty tray with a little white flag on it. Kind of hard to be filled up by that.
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by caleeb101 » 04 Apr 2017, 18:58

Crab_Spider wrote:The Queen is telepathic and has been shown to be able to bend this ability to non-xenomorphs as well, telepathy is the ability to read and understand electrical signals (or thought) in the brain, this has been supported in many X-Men comics when Magneto is repeatedly established to be able to interrupt, block, create and even jam in on radio waves and telepathic conversations. His power of magnetism isn't limited to just magnetism, it waves over to the 3 other, less powerful fundamental forces of the universe. If my hypothesis serves correct, it's plausible the Queen is manipulating the console with a magnetic field she is unwittingly emitting to use the console, as she understands how those consoles work by having the xenos scout around it and through a couple of memories from the now deceased Marines, including SLs.

I slash APCs because it's emitting light and a grenade went off and when it exploded on the APC, everything shut off.
yeah, no. xeno bad, marine good, git gud u chetr. another thing that annoys me is neuro. if the neuro hits my hand, surely it'd make me drop whats in my hand if I had anything, and nothing else. if it hits my legs, i'd understand falling to the ground. i shouldn't bother over this game anymore though. its not worth the effort to complain and its easier just to enjoy what you can (yes this was inspired by that new post: Embrace the Suck)
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Simo94 » 04 Apr 2017, 19:44

so many women yet no kitchen on the Sulaco


also aiming at chest area aka ABOVE THE GROUND and while shooting a hunter who pounced a marine you FF the marine instead, who is laying on the GROUND, logic overload
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Crab_Spider » 04 Apr 2017, 19:54

Simo94 wrote:so many women yet no kitchen on the Sulaco


also aiming at chest area aka ABOVE THE GROUND and while shooting a hunter who pounced a marine you FF the marine instead, who is laying on the GROUND, logic overload
This isn't... we're not shitting on mechanics, we're shitting on the decisions the Marines make in an average round that would land them in a hell of trouble IRL.
You will never be as bad as the baldie who picked up a tactical shotgun while a hunter was pouncing on top of a CMO for 4 seconds, with his only response being to pace around before being decap'd by said hunter. You are not Brett Kimple, and you never will be. You are not the reason why I regular MP.

I am John "Buckshot" Rhodes, the Tactical Snowflake Hunter

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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Monoo » 04 Apr 2017, 20:15

Marines are allowed to queue up in a giant lunch line looking thing and demand various attachments for their guns, some combinations of which are contradictory. All this instead of the marines being issued a short list of acceptable attachments for the mission by their commanding officer.

After about an hour of time on the ground, the various squads completely break down and blend together, losing all discipline and cohesion. The four senior ground officers are usually left unprotected or go off of their own volition and die in some obscure mudpit.

The Sulaco's escape pods take twenty whole minutes to fuel up and another 3 minutes to be launched. Kind of defeats the point of escaping, no?

The amount of ship staff tasked with keeping things running smoothly (Docs, MT and CE, RO and CT) are far, FAR outweighed by the amount of combat personnel, leading to some potential disasters such as an overflowing medbay, requisitions riots, and supermatter delamination.
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by caleeb101 » 05 Apr 2017, 09:41

Monoo wrote:Marines are allowed to queue up in a giant lunch line looking thing and demand various attachments for their guns, some combinations of which are contradictory. All this instead of the marines being issued a short list of acceptable attachments for the mission by their commanding officer.

After about an hour of time on the ground, the various squads completely break down and blend together, losing all discipline and cohesion. The four senior ground officers are usually left unprotected or go off of their own volition and die in some obscure mudpit.

The Sulaco's escape pods take twenty whole minutes to fuel up and another 3 minutes to be launched. Kind of defeats the point of escaping, no?

The amount of ship staff tasked with keeping things running smoothly (Docs, MT and CE, RO and CT) are far, FAR outweighed by the amount of combat personnel, leading to some potential disasters such as an overflowing medbay, requisitions riots, and supermatter delamination.
in marine terms, they're screwed before the operation begins. xenos are the much better side by mechanics alone and only have a 1 unit command that has no more than 1 job (assuming the rest of the hive is competent enough to do the rest). as long as the eggs are laid, the queen can just sit there. drones do the hive jobs, runners grab hosts and other castes kill marines as well. e-z-p-z.
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Crab_Spider » 05 Apr 2017, 10:06

caleeb101 wrote:in marine terms, they're screwed before the operation begins. xenos are the much better side by mechanics alone and only have a 1 unit command that has no more than 1 job (assuming the rest of the hive is competent enough to do the rest). as long as the eggs are laid, the queen can just sit there. drones do the hive jobs, runners grab hosts and other castes kill marines as well. e-z-p-z.
Why are you people shitting on the mechanics, god dammit if you want to complain about the mechanics, make a suggestion or get good, what next? Apop is going to come in here and actually change the mechanics based on how much you guys bitch about em? Dammit boys, I came here to see how fucked we'd actually be if we were to add in IRL factors of military and physics, not be reminded I'm playing a game and the Marines get no consequences for their actions when they play the game with no interest in RP.
You will never be as bad as the baldie who picked up a tactical shotgun while a hunter was pouncing on top of a CMO for 4 seconds, with his only response being to pace around before being decap'd by said hunter. You are not Brett Kimple, and you never will be. You are not the reason why I regular MP.

I am John "Buckshot" Rhodes, the Tactical Snowflake Hunter

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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by caleeb101 » 05 Apr 2017, 12:39

Crab_Spider wrote:Why are you people shitting on the mechanics, god dammit if you want to complain about the mechanics, make a suggestion or get good, what next? Apop is going to come in here and actually change the mechanics based on how much you guys bitch about em? Dammit boys, I came here to see how fucked we'd actually be if we were to add in IRL factors of military and physics, not be reminded I'm playing a game and the Marines get no consequences for their actions when they play the game with no interest in RP.

i didn't even complain. i just said that's how the game is and that it's easier for xenos. the only mechanic i currently bitch about is neurospit because it hitting your hand means your whole person goes down but it should really mean you just drop whats in your hand
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by Karmac » 05 Apr 2017, 12:49

Fucking afros.
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Re: Reality Ensues: Baldie Edition

Post by 4thsurviver » 05 Apr 2017, 18:05

Marines shooting out the windows of tool storage. Then trying to justify it to the MP that investigates about how they wanted a screw driver. Marines calling out the CE or Command on general comms thinking they know better. Marines grabbing weapons, ammo, and equipment then abandoning them in prep, the mess hall, and briefing.
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