Tak'Vir - TotallyNotAWizard's Predator App.

[AverageSpitter]

Byond ID: TotallyNotAWizard

Marine Name (so we know who you are; if you play alien mostly, state that here): Reed Schaefer.
I play marine at times, but i'm mostly a xeno player.

Name of the character you want whitelisted (The name your predator will use. This must match your in-game predator name): Tak'Vir

Are you familiar with the Predator Code Of Honor?

If that means ''When in doubt don't plasma caster the shit out of it'' yeah, I'm familiar with it.

Character background (An ADEQUATE description and story of your predators background):

► Show Spoiler

Tak'Vir was born a high-bred Yautja, Under the mantle of the well-known ''Ikthala'' Clan. Tak'Vir has always been an overconfident Yautja since he was young. Thinking his whole life was already served, Being himself a high-bred, He was respected, And was expected to be a brave and strong warrior. Tak'Vir thought everything was going to be a cakewalk during his formation as a warrior. But something happened. He became Cuth'un Dak'Te's toy. Tak'Vir had no idea of his existence before his training. Cuth'un was just some low-breed yautja from some clan dedicated to smithing, as far as he knew. Little Tak'Vir did know, That a mere low-breed, Would become his torturer, And soon sworn enemy. Tak'Vir was just an unblooded Yautja by the time. Tak'Vir has always been very proud, And vanity would be the most notable trait of him, Because of the clan he was worth in. Apparently Cuth'un liked to antagonize high-breeds, but Tak'Vir was his favorite one, In a perverse way. ''I just can't stop him! How strong can that lowly beast be!?'' That thought would stay in TakVir's head for a long time. Time passed, And during a spar Tak'Vir finally lost it.

Cuth'un bellowed,"You'll never amount to your ancestors, whelp!"

Tak'Vir was angry. He answered. ''What could such a low-bred like you know about that!? Your ancestors are nothing but dust when compared to mine!''

Such an insult towards him wouldn't go unharmed.

Tak'Vir charged toward the brute, Determinated to finally take him down, And show him what the Ikthala Clan's youngest was able to.

But as soon as he met anger, He met failure.

He tripped, And fell to the ground. His sworn enemy didn't even have a scratch. Tak'Vir Felt pathetic. Impotent. ''You will pay for this, Lowborn!''

These words would fuel him through his formation, Which he barely completed, In a desperate attempt to show everyone he was no weakling. It was time for the final test.

Tak'Vir, The hateful.

► Show Spoiler

It was the time. The hunt was on.

The young ones would descent into the planet ''NB-434'', A planet with light snowfall. Darkness and a painful cold breeze would greet him, As soon he got out of his pod. He took a look around, Flicking through his mask's different HUDs. It didn't take him long to spot an unusually large Yautja perched atop a tree in the distance. There was no doubt. It was Cuth'un.

He would head towards him, Leaving his prints on the snow, As he looked around, Making sure he wouldn't get ambushed in his way there. Why was he going towards Cuth'un?

Simple. Tak'Vir wanted to be the one to see his torturer's failure.

Cuth'Un entered a cave. A cold place, Lined with frost. Icicles would hang from above. Tak'Vir didn't take long, Entering right behind him.

''I'm here to see your upcoming miserable failure, Lowborn.''

A solid crunch would be heard through the cave, And then, A loud cry from the towering Yautja. The serpent would then flank it from above, pinning him to the ground. Tak'Vir saw the chance to finally humiliate the dreadful ''dickhead'' who tortured him for all that time. As he extended his wirstblade and took a step towards Cuth'un, He would freeze in place almost instantly, As soon as the lowborn warns him.

"If you dare take another step, I will crush you like this terrible bug atop of me!"

Tak'Vir was scared. He felt overwhelmed by all the embarrassments he suffered earlier. He wasn't able to move. He lowered his head. His attention wasn't in the struggle between the serpent and the lowborn anymore. He was in a trance. Locked up in his own thoughts. His whole clan's history. Has it really come to an end, Due to how pathetic Tak'Vir was compared to a mere lowborn? Tak'Vir thoughts raced. A whole life, Living up to his clan's expectations. Yet he never was even close to his ancestors. He lived his whole life, Thinking everything was already sorted for him. Tak'Vir finally realized, He had to put lots on effort, If he wanted to outbest Cuth'Un, And anyone in his way.

He would soon get snapped out of this trance, Being shoved aside by the lowborn. "Witness what a real hunter can do, s'yuit-de zabin!"

Tak'Vir would remain silent, frozen in place. The serpent was now slammed against the icy walls of the cave. The lowborn would cut the serpent in the abdomen, Spattering Tak'Vir with the slizzing blood. He would groan in pain, As Cuth'Un just laughs at him.

''We will see who is the insect...''

Anger would now be his fuel to accomplish as his goals. Tak'Vir just headed deeper in the cave, As a victorious Cuth'Un leaved the place. His test wasn't done yet. His pain was now gone, His anger and the wishes of outbesting the lowborn would be more than enough to give him enough strength to ignore the pain. A hiss would be heard, Coming from deeper into the cave. Even darker, Inviting him. Tak'Vir would venture through the black pitch depths of the cave, In order to hunt the final prey. He was flicking through his mask HUD-views. His breathing was even. The cave was silent. He felt focused. It was finally time for him to prove himself. The hiss would be heard again, closer to him, as he continued to venture in to the cave. Then, All of sudden, The serpent would ambush him from a hole in one of the walls, Attempting to pin the youngblood to the ground. The serpent met failure, as Tak'Vir managed to push it back, In a sudden surge of strength and adrenaline. The serpent would try to pounce over him again, This time being able to make Tak'Vir stumble a bit, As he saw the chance to slash it with his wirstblade. The creature would just dodge it. Tak'Vir wouldn't flinch, charging towards it. A quick flashback of the time he attempted to charge his torturer came to him. This time... He wouldn't fail! There wasn't time for failure now! He would slam the serpent against a wall, Trying to pin it against it. The sharp tail of the beast would quickly head towards his head, but he quickly managed to get hold of it with his right hand. The creature quickly met death, As his left wirstblade went through the beast's abdomen. The beast let out a roar of pain, Green blood bubbling out of it's mouth, Tak'Vir didn't ease up. Fueled by wrath, Which proceeded to pile up, from day to day since his torture had begun.

''I AM NO INSECT!''

He bellowed in anger, As he ripped the cut on the beast's abdomen.

''I AM A WARRIOR! A PROUD HIGH-BRED FROM THE IKTHALA. YOU. ARE. NOTHING.''

The beast stopped moving, And fell to the ground. Tak'Vir took a deep breath, As he proceeded to take the trophy that rightfully belonged to him now. The result of a successful hunt.

The ceremony had concluded. A warrior was born that day. Fueled by anger. He had sworn to himself, That he would outbest Cuth'Un, And uphold the name of his clan.

How do you intend to play your predator (as in, describe HOW you will act/play your predator)?

I plan having my predator act as a silent observer, and challenging prey he deems worthy. I'd like duels where the balance is tipped off more towards the enemy, like an ancient ravager and such, As it keeps things interesting and gives xenos a chance to actually feel like they are not as hopeless as they would usually be. It's expected for Tak'Vir to bite more than he can chew, As he tries his hardest to uphold the name of his clan.

When fighting, He likes to put up a show, He will enjoy his fight more if he got spectators, Regardless of the result of it.

Marines could be worthy prey too, if they prove themselves.

Why should we whitelist you?

As a xeno main, i have seen lots of the xeno salt that goes ''Fucking grief role'' and such. I myself have noticed that most Predators do not RP with xenomorphs as much as one would expect, And i plan focusing on interacting with xenos, and having some good RP with them. Instead of having xenomorphs being salty in dchat, i'd like to give them a good round, Keeping stuff interesting for them and such.

I won't ignore marines, But as i said, Xenomorphs will be my main focus when it comes to interaction.


Have you been banned from CM in the last month for any reason (we will check, and lies may result in immediate denial)?

Yeah, For making a joke about jews as a xeno and having couple of notes on top of it. (Nothing really troublesome like griefing, powergaming and such)

Are you currently banned from any other servers and if so, why?

Citadel comes to mind, I was a new player and thought beating someone to death would be fun, ban is old as fuck and i have no intentions of going back there *shrug*

Do you understand that any player - donor or otherwise - can have their whitelist status revoked should they break our rules or disobey the Predator Code of Honor?

Of course, It makes sense as being whitelisted is not a right, it's a privilege.

[AverageSpitter]

Bump, hope i get some feedback soon

[Ghostdex]

Bump, hope i get some feedback soon

Dont bump your application, this could take over a month, you need to have patience.

I’ll review this sometime later.

[AverageSpitter]

Dont bump your application, this could take over a month, you need to have patience.

I’ll review this sometime later.

Alright, i'm sorry. I'll wait then

[Rikman]

The talking is confusing at times in the story, but other than that your app is pretty good.
Neutral leaning towards +1, will decide in the future when more reviews are out.
+1, the reviews below point out the good and the bad, and I believe that the good outwieghs the bad, looking over your issues in the story.

[AverageSpitter]

The talking is confusing at times in the story, but other than that your app is pretty good.

Neutral leaning towards +1, will decide in the future when more reviews are out.

Thanks a lot for the feedback!

Yeah, i noticed it could be a bit confuse when checking it :^) my bad

[TheMusician321]

Backstory was a bit confusing, from what I can gather from it your Pred is hateful and has a clear goal to become better than Cuth'Un.

My main gripe is that you claim to play xeno a lot, which in my books is very bad, it doesn't help that your marine name doesn't ring any bells either.

Playstyle is also very generic, be more creative with it if you end up getting denied.

Forum activity is decent, 77 posts in about a month.

Focusing RP on xenos is also pretty good.

I'll have to stick with a neutral leaning on positive, mainly because I never see your marine character and that you claim to play xeno all the time which doesn't really help your case since we can't really tell xenos apart and we'll have a hard time seeing you roleplay.

[AverageSpitter]

Backstory was a bit confusing, from what I can gather from it your Pred is hateful and has a clear goal to become better than Cuth'Un.

My main gripe is that you claim to play xeno a lot, which in my books is very bad, it doesn't help that your marine name doesn't ring any bells either.

Playstyle is also very generic, be more creative with it if you end up getting denied.

Forum activity is decent, 77 posts in about a month.

Focusing RP on xenos is also pretty good.

I'll have to stick with a neutral leaning on positive, mainly because I never see your marine character and that you claim to play xeno all the time which doesn't really help your case since we can't really tell xenos apart and we'll have a hard time seeing you roleplay.

In all fairness, i do RP as a xenomorph sometimes, mainly with survivors. I either try to act spooky on them or i just try to communicate when they do.

I once had this UPP survivor who literally did everything to save his group's ass and get to the LZ but got shot by marines on sight, then we captured him as he was the only one who made it out alive, I was the sent guarding him and he was trying to communicate, Came to the conclusion he wanted to kill marines, Let him out, he got his gear, and we went to the battlefield together, with murderous intent. Shit went good but he naded himself by accident and then the larva he had on him bursted.

10/10 Survivor, Will miss you Glenn

Back to the point, Yeah, i am a solid RPer when i get the chance to RP, As i got a long experience on it. Might try to play marine more often so people can check

[TheMusician321]

Well I can't go off on it on your word alone so I'll be watching you in further rounds, try to play ship-side roles more as that's where in my experience most of the RP happens.

[x31stOverlord]

Commentary:

Story is good in length and pretty decent in content, although I'm not a huge fan of how you portray the rivalry between the two Yautja. Whilst rivalries are not uncommon I do not believe it wise to have portrayed your Pred being "stuck in a trance" whilst in the very crux of a potential engagement. Especially in the presence of a serpent. You are a grown hunter, not a teenage school child dealing with a bully.

Good forum history as well as being very active here. Good sign as it gives us the ability to understand your personality and temperment.

I don't know your character and haven't had any experiences with yourself. You said you play mainly xeno which is fine. But I cannot personally testify to your RP capability or playstyle. I would recommend spending a little time on marines just so anyone who wants to review this app can see what you are like on the ship etc.

TL/DR:

- Good story. Minor criticisms (mostly personal) ( -/+ )

- Good forum post history and level of activity. ( + )

- No personal experience with player in marine environment. Cannot judge RP level. ( - )

Verdict:

-1 As of the 20/03/2018

Don't despair, I will be reviewing these when/if I see any activity of yours in game etc.

[AverageSpitter]

Commentary: I do not believe it wise to have portrayed your Pred being "stuck in a trance" whilst in the very crux of a potential engagement.

Well, I just wanted to put out some character development on the story, instead of your regular ''he trained and became a good and powerful warrior'', I know it was a bit out of place, but i wanted to try something different for my pred, something that would eventually lead him to be a hateful warrior, obsessed with fulfilling the standards of his clan and outbesting his sworn enemy.

I had a good premise, i just needed a way to apply it, and well, i ended up with this. *shrug*

Could have been done better? For sure, and i accept that :^)

[Heckenshutze]

by 07/03/2018 you had 77 post in a month.

Now, in the present you have 113 and I have seen you a lot around here so that's good enough activity for me and I expect for you to keep it that way.

--

Your background history, it's kind of interesting, because you turn over the tip making the "low-tier" predator to look like the bad guy instead of the "High-born" one (like many time happens) so I like it; the fact he crashes into the wall of Reality that being a high-tier individual means shit if their skills aren't at the same level of his reputation it's a good way of 'humanizing' your pred so good job on that.

--

I have one single issue: how do you intend to RP with xenos assuming you may already know, as a xeno main, that predators get dog piled as soon the xenos see an opportunity, leaving RP choices to a minimum, besides, you spoke about 'dueling' xenos, remember that duels are reserved for honorable prey, Xenos don't have honor, instead, they'll use any dirty tactic or some reinforcements to take you down (Regardless of that, some players do fight clean againts preds, but it's hard to identify them on the hunt) I do agree xenos are open to RP with you as long you show them you're willing to. But how you'd do that?

Also, I need an example of your gameplay style: Let's say, it's LV-624. You're doing some terrain negotiation and you spot two xenos strong enough to be considered good sport, later on you found a pack of survivors. You decide not to interfere, since it's early in the round. After building your lodge (Which is kind of mandatory) you cross yourself again in the path of the xenos and the survivor, one of the xenos is dead and from the back of survivors only one is alive and fighting. Sadly, the xeno got the upper hand and stunned him and you are spotted.

Now you're faced againts two worthy sport, a Serpent and an Ooman that killed and fought two serpents. How'd you react? Taking into account the fact your decision can affect the whole round AND the fun of one of the players.

[AverageSpitter]

by 07/03/2018 you had 77 post in a month.

Now, in the present you have 113 and I have seen you a lot around here so that's good enough activity for me and I expect for you to keep it that way.

--

Your background history, it's kind of interesting, because you turn over the tip making the "low-tier" predator to look like the bad guy instead of the "High-born" one (like many time happens) so I like it; the fact he crashes into the wall of Reality that being a high-tier individual means shit if their skills aren't at the same level of his reputation and that's a very human behaviour / feeling so good job on that.

--

I have one single issue: how do you intend to RP with xenos assuming you may already know, as a xeno main, that predators get dog piled as soon the xenos see an opportunity, leaving RP choices to a minimum, besides, you spoke about 'dueling' xenos, remember that duels are reserved for honorable prey, Xenos don't have honor, instead, they'll use any dirty tactic or some reinforcements to take you down (Regardless of that, some players do fight clean againts preds, but it's hard to identify them on the hunt) I do agree xenos are open to RP with you as long you show them you're willing to. But how you'd do that?

Also, I need an example of your gameplay style: Let's say, it's LV-624. You're doing some terrain negotiation and you spot two xenos strong enough to be considered good sport, later on you found a pack of survivors. You decide not to interfere, since it's early in the round. After building your lodge (Which is kind of mandatory) you cross yourself again in the path of the xenos and the survivor, one of the xenos is dead and from the back of survivors only one is alive and fighting. Sadly, the xeno got the upper hand and stunned him and you are spotted.

Now you're faced againts two worthy sport, a Serpent and an Ooman that killed and fought two serpents. How'd you react? Taking into account the fact your decision can affect the whole round AND the fun of one of the players.

I would take my time when looking for a xeno to RP with, it's pretty clear that you can't run to a runner and go like ''OH HEY I WANT TO RP WITH YOU.''

for what i have seen, As soon as the hive is aware of the presence of Yautja, Some sort of switch flips on them, and you got to expect for they always be watching you, and updating the whole hive on your location. So. My way to approach xenos would be uncloaking near a relatively isolated xeno, and see how it reacts. If it instantly proceeds to run away, or tries to attack me without any RP prior to it, It's an instant no.

If it stands still and even tries to communicate with me, I would take it as an opportunity to RP with them, Which i will take without doubt. Not lowering my guard, of course, because lots of stuff can happen that interrupt a RP. I myself have seen it, for example, when Roleplaying with a pred (Which rarely happens because they either ignore me or are on more important stuff) Either marines spot me and start shooting me (Ending the interaction as i either run away / try to fight back, and the pred cloaks) or some runner/hunter haves to pounce the pred.

Worst case the xeno will just be trying to distract me as it calls over the hivemind for people to fuck me up, in which given case, i will just do the Bill Carson.

About your question, I would see how the end fights, maybe the ooman can get up and axe the xeno or some stuff (I just saw that happen today lol), When one of them ends up being the winner, i will make a choice.

If the XENO wins: Uncloak in front of it so it's aware of my presence. Roar and point at it. (Yeah i know it feels a bit mainstream, But i got to admit it looks good.) And use the vox caster to say something like ''I'll be observing you.'' or some stuff like that. So the xeno is aware it got my attention as a candidate to be my prey. Which would lead us to the usual toying around and baiting until i fight it one on one in a place clear of obstacles and other xenos who might interfere. (At least for the first half, someone ALWAYS interferes.)

If the HUMAN wins: Forcefully take it to the research dome. (Or lead them to the place if it trusts me for any reason whatsoever.) Mend their wounds, close the shutters, give them a weapon, And engage it in a duel.

If the ooman refuses to fight and/or just tries to flee the whole fight, i will just deem it as too coward to fight a real warrior, And after a huge disappointment i would just take a limb (I mean, c'mon, they just fucking blueballed me.) and let them go.

[Heckenshutze]

I would take my time when looking for a xeno to RP with, it's pretty clear that you can't run to a runner and go like ''OH HEY I WANT TO RP WITH YOU.''

for what i have seen, As soon as the hive is aware of the presence of Yautja, Some sort of switch flips on them, and you got to expect for they always be watching you, and updating the whole hive on your location. So. My way to approach xenos would be uncloaking near a relatively isolated xeno, and see how it reacts. If it instantly proceeds to run away, or tries to attack me without any RP prior to it, It's an instant no.

If it stands still and even tries to communicate with me, I would take it as an opportunity to RP with them, Which i will take without doubt. Not lowering my guard, of course, because lots of stuff can happen that interrupt a RP. I myself have seen it, for example, when Roleplaying with a pred (Which rarely happens because they either ignore me or are on more important stuff) Either marines spot me and start shooting me (Ending the interaction as i either run away / try to fight back, and the pred cloaks) or some runner/hunter haves to pounce the pred.

Worst case the xeno will just be trying to distract me as it calls over the hivemind for people to fuck me up, in which given case, i will just do the Bill Carson.

About your question, I would see how the end fights, maybe the ooman can get up and axe the xeno or some stuff (I just saw that happen today lol), When one of them ends up being the winner, i will make a choice.

If the XENO wins: Uncloak in front of it so it's aware of my presence. Roar and point at it. (Yeah i know it feels a bit mainstream, But i got to admit it looks good.) And use the vox caster to say something like ''I'll be observing you.'' or some stuff like that. So the xeno is aware it got my attention as a candidate to be my prey. Which would lead us to the usual toying around and baiting until i fight it one on one in a place clear of obstacles and other xenos who might interfere. (At least for the first half, someone ALWAYS interferes.)

If the HUMAN wins: Forcefully take it to the research dome. (Or lead them to the place if it trusts me for any reason whatsoever.) Mend their wounds, close the shutters, give them a weapon, And engage it in a duel.

If the ooman refuses to fight and/or just tries to flee the whole fight, i will just deem it as too coward to fight a real warrior, And after a huge disappointment i would just take a limb (I mean, c'mon, they just fucking blueballed me.) and let them go.

Good, you're actually sure of what you're going to do and how you plan to do it, very well.


---


Right, not interfering at all in their fight is actually the best option to pick since you avoid getting salt from one of the players. But a reminder to the honor code, Survivors have special treatment (you cannot hunt them, hurt them since they're innocent) if you decide he's worthy enough for duel and he refuses to, taking a limb because of that might be too harsh. If the predator feels that much of an offense, a single disarm/push down might do the work and let him go.

I liked your answers and anything that needs to be polished can be done by RP during a hunt round. +1 from me

[Nightwolf901]

From what i have read on the others replies and your App. You seem alright. You marine name doesn't stand out to me but i get that you play xeno scum =p. Story was okay. Had a slight taste of its own. Playstyle can't really be judged because not even all of us stick to it. +1 from the pinko

[zoboomafoo]

I really liked your story, good spin on the high-tier vs. low-tier struggle. I've seen Reed a bit, he seems aight. Maybe play marines more so people can judge your RP abilities more. Though, you are one of a few xenos I can sometimes pick out based off playstyle, you spook the marines good! *hiss.

+1 For me

[AverageSpitter]

I really liked your story, good spin on the high-tier vs. low-tier struggle. I've seen Reed a bit, he seems aight. Maybe play marines more so people can judge your RP abilities more. Though, you are one of a few xenos I can sometimes pick out based off playstyle, you spook the marines good! *hiss.

+1 For me

Thanks a lot! I really love when i get the chance to spook captured humans, Just to give them some RP while they wait for the inevitable to happen

I really try to play marine, But being xeno is just too darn fun for me hehe sorry

[AverageSpitter]

Good, you're actually sure of what you're going to do and how you plan to do it, very well.


---


Right, not interfering at all in their fight is actually the best option to pick since you avoid getting salt from one of the players. But a reminder to the honor code, Survivors have special treatment (you cannot hunt them, hurt them since they're innocent) if you decide he's worthy enough for duel and he refuses to, taking a limb because of that might be too harsh. If the predator feels that much of an offense, a single disarm/push down might do the work and let him go.

I liked your answers and anything that needs to be polished can be done by RP during a hunt round. +1 from me

If i get approved, I won't disappoint you! (Or anyone) You have my word! Thanks for the feedback and the chance to express my plans regarding RP with xenos

[Ghostdex]

I don't feel like theres much else for me to say that hasn't been said, I like your response to Hecken and I also like what I've seen in game, +1 from me

[edda]

I've literally never seen you in-game before, likely on account of you being a beno main, but your thread responses are pretty convincing. I'm leaning on a +1.

[Avalanchee]

Story seems fine, only problem is that i don't see you much in the game as a Marine.
I don't think i ever encountered you and trust me i am trying to talk with everyone.


I will try to search for you and RP with you.
But for now it's 50/50 from me.

[NGGJamie]

Denied, not enough positive support over the course of the last month.

The ideas you present in your backstory are good, however their execution could use some work. Don't be afraid to use speech tags in your writing like "I am no insect!" Tak'Vir said/shouted, and avoid using ALL CAPS for the quotes in your writing as doing so is generally considered bad form except in very rare cases. As I mentioned in Omicega's app where he did not use speech tags, using the word "said" over and over in your writing will not harm it in any way. In your case, your dialogue becomes slightly confusing as to who is talking, jarring the reader and forcing them to track who spoke last at all times.