Simon - Synthetic Application

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Survivor
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Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Survivor » 27 Sep 2018, 22:21

Byond ID:

Dr. Lance

Marine Name (so we know who you are; if you play alien mostly, state that here):

Pierce Jackson

Name/Designation of the Synth Character you’re requesting to use (Follows common naming rules, and requires a first name with no last name):

Simon

Examples of acceptable names: James, Mason, Xavier, Felix, Otto, Allan, Jessica
Examples of unacceptable names: Obama, Jesus, King, Dragon, Godly, Snyper, Circuits


Are you familiar with the Synthetic Programming and Guidelines (http://www.colonial-marines.com/viewtop ... 57&t=14417)?

I have become familiar with the Synthetic Programing.

Synthetic Character Story (An ADEQUATE description and story of your Synthetics actions and involvement in a previous mission onboard the Almayer):
► Show Spoiler
How do you intend to play your Synth (as in, describe HOW you will act/play your Synth and what support roles you’ll mainly focus on, what is your synthetics quirk)?

As a Synthetic Unit, I plan on being able to effectively move wherever I'm needed and do whatever I'm asked, while finding time to fit in Roleplay in between. As a synthetic, my main support role will probably be engineering. I'm familiar with building FOBs, repairing APCs, dismantling walls, setting up turrets and sentries, and constructing. I also see myself doing a lot of surgery, as I've memorized all of the surgical procedures by heart. That being said, however I can do any task I'm asked of.

As for my Synthetic's quirk, he has a Cocky and confident demeaner. This doesn't mean he will act like an asshole, however. It just shows that Simon will not back down to most tasks, as he doesn't doubt himself.

How familiar are you with support roles? (ie; Medical, MT, Science, SO)
► Show Spoiler
Why should we whitelist you?

As a Synthetic, I want to bring a good mix between Competence and High roleplay. As you probably know, I'm whitelisted for Commander. As Commander, I've always tried to hold onto that mix. Personally, I feel I do a fine job, but I truly want a better job to do it with, as Commander is just a rank in the end, compared to something different.

As a Synthetic, the expectations for High Roleplay are even larger than they are for Commander, and that's exactly what I want. I feel Synthetic will be a better way for me, not only because I can support the marines in a more helpful way than words, but also because I can accept the challenge of keeping into Character while doing it all.

Have you been banned from CM in the last month for any reason (we will check, and lies may result in immediate denial)?

I have not been banned from CM in the last month.

Are you currently banned from any other servers and if so, why?

I am not banned from any other servers that I know of.

Do you understand that any player - donor or otherwise - can have their whitelist status revoked should they break our rules or the Synthetic Programming Guideline?

I understand.

Final Note

Thank you to whoever reads this, I'd love the feedback!
"Sorry, but... I'm the only winner in this story." - Commander Pierce Jackson

Commodore Pierce Jackson/Jack "Survivor" Lance

SYN Simon

Young Blood Ha'ju Vagear

Part of the CO Council along with taketheshot56, Bancrose, Lumdor, and Frans_Feiffer.

PM me if you have any questions about CO

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MattAtlas
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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by MattAtlas » 28 Sep 2018, 09:45

Story seems a bit short but it does the job. Tells me what your synth will act like so it's good imo.

The quirk seems okay at first glance, I'm sure you know the boundaries of being cocky. I also know you to be a competent roleplayer and you're good at support roles. +1
I'm part of the Synthetic Council with ThesoldierLLJK and Jakkkk. Feel free to DM me on the forums or Discord (Matt#5881) if you have any questions about synths.

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Sleepy Retard » 28 Sep 2018, 10:00

Technically the story has to be aboard the Almayer. I actually just noticed this myself - not that this'll detract from your app in any way shape or form. Just something interesting I noticed.

The story...was weird. It's not exactly written well, it's a bit of a mess with bad wording and an awkward premise. To clarify, a space ship was just hit by another space ship, yes? The consequences of such a thing would be very high. Including breaches of hull, not just a busted APC. Unless you mean the freight shuttle was the size of something like the dropship? Nitpicking, but I digress.

The content of the story was a tad weak. The idea of ship crashing into the side was very interesting. But how it reads is poor. It feels...very gamey, if you get me. He pulled apart some chairs to make an APC frame. Personally, it would read much better if you had written something like him assembling a makeshift frame out of a chair - however you want to describe that is up to you. But remember - you're writing a story, how it happens in game isn't how it has to happen in the story, and you can take some artistic liberty.

The quirk is good, workable and if you don't go overboard it's reasonable.

I know you're competent, and I know you RP a lot when I see you poke your head in game.

The story is definitely a huge minus to me. In every other regard you're fine, so I'm neutral leaning to a plus one. Convince me - give me a written excerpt of Simon assembling a makeshift frame, instead of straight taking a chair apart for metal.
Image I was a Synth Councilmen, alongside Jakkk, MattAtlas, SovietKitty and Omicega.

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by ThesoldierLLJK » 28 Sep 2018, 10:02

I know you can roleplay, but I think the problem you're gonna have from my synth compatriots is your short story.
Still like every other application I review I determine it on the basis if you can RP and you're not a shitlord.

Not a shitlord
+1

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Jakkkk » 28 Sep 2018, 13:32

"As he doesn't doubt himself."

No synthetic doubts themselves, they lack insecurity.
Olaf's dossier: viewtopic.php?f=91&t=16128
Mortimer: viewtopic.php?f=149&t=16195
Xarvis Ut'ur-era: viewtopic.php?f=124&t=17817

Synthetic Council Term One, along with Sleepy Retard and MattAtlas.

"Harry, I'm going to let you in on a little secret. Every day, once a day, give yourself a present. Don't plan it. Don't wait for it. Just let it happen. It could be a new shirt at the men's store, a catnap in your office chair, or two cups of good, hot black coffee."

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Survivor » 28 Sep 2018, 16:30

El Defaultio wrote:
28 Sep 2018, 10:00
-Snip
Hey, thanks for the feedback! It's greatly appreciated, and I'm glad you brought up a few points, as I would definitely like to address them!

Firstly, I do agree the story was a little weak. I'm surely no literary master, and it clearly shows. This is actually the shortened version of the original one I made, which had a lot more context. However, I didn't use that version as it was about five times longer, and based on a few opinions I asked, they told me that it was a little too long. I shortened it to be a bit more enjoyable, however that also took away many of the important details. Either way, I definitely agree with me lacking a bit on the story itself.

As for the APC frame, I definitely missed a great opportunity to add the creation of the frame into the story, and am slightly dissapointed in myself to be honest. Since you've asked, I'll make a small excerpt for the story.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"As Simon examined the APC, he concluded the frame was entirely destroyed. Simon then pried off the plating underneath the APC, and found the Power Control Module to be unsalvagable. Simon asked if he could see the Chief Engineer's bag, but the Chief gave no response. Simon took the bag and toolbelt from the Chief engineer, and got the necessary supplies to repair the APC except the metal needed to create a new frame.

Simon looked around the triage center, and saw a few metal chairs near the entrance. Simon grabbed one of the chairs and took it near the APC. After removing a few screws on the legs, he bent the legs into more of a square shape as the outer frame. Simon then took the seat section of the chair and welded it to the outerframe to work as a makeshift inner frame. He then went back to working on the original APC. He first beat the cover off with a wrench, after a couple of swings. Once the frame was off, he unscrewed the broken frame. After words, Simon severed the wires from the useless Power Control Module. Simon quickly pried off the original frame, and attempted to set the one he created into it's place. It didn't fit properly, so Simon had to bend the legs of the chair a little more to get the Outer frame to lock in place.

After he got the frame in place, he reconnected the wires, and replaced the broken PCM with one from the Chief Engineer's bag. Once it was properly connected, Simon screwed the makeshift frame into place, and replaced the APC's battery. Although the battery barely fit in the frame, it stayed in place and did it's job, as Simon closed the cover and put the glass frame back into place. He swiped on his ID card, and turned all of the options onto auto. Slowly but surely, each of the lights in medbay flickered to life, as Simon started to move the Chief Engineer back towards the Operation Theatres."
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I can definitely see this being a lot better than what I actually put into the story. I hope this is what you are looking for, and as I said at the beginning, thanks for the feedback!

Edit: Small thing I forgot to mention, I PM'd Emerald Blood asking her about the story not being on the Almayer before I posted it, and they said that it was fine.
Last edited by Survivor on 28 Sep 2018, 16:43, edited 1 time in total.
"Sorry, but... I'm the only winner in this story." - Commander Pierce Jackson

Commodore Pierce Jackson/Jack "Survivor" Lance

SYN Simon

Young Blood Ha'ju Vagear

Part of the CO Council along with taketheshot56, Bancrose, Lumdor, and Frans_Feiffer.

PM me if you have any questions about CO

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Survivor » 28 Sep 2018, 16:42

Jakkkk wrote:
28 Sep 2018, 13:32
"As he doesn't doubt himself."

No synthetic doubts themselves, they lack insecurity.
You definitely brought up a good point here, as I was a little unspecific. I didn't mean it as a literal feeling, but more of how it will portray his actions. From what I see from a few Synths, sometimes they will put preserving their lives ahead of doing certain orders. When I said Simon wouldn't doubt himself, I meant that Simon wouldn't be the type of Synthetic to ignore an order due to the dangers as I've seen many players do. Simon believes that he can do anything asked of him if physically possible and legal, and will not stop at attempting to, lets say, save a marine from an alien dragging him off into the LV Forests, or forming barricades directly on the frontlines. Sometimes, the task as hand may be close to impossible, but as a Synthetic he was programmed to do as asked.

Although one could argue this is supposed to be average synthetic behavior, it's not always portrayed in game, as there is a player controlling it beyond the Synthetic, who wants to do their own thing sometimes. I wish to just do what I'm supposed to do and asked of without question as long as falls in line with the Synthetic code.
"Sorry, but... I'm the only winner in this story." - Commander Pierce Jackson

Commodore Pierce Jackson/Jack "Survivor" Lance

SYN Simon

Young Blood Ha'ju Vagear

Part of the CO Council along with taketheshot56, Bancrose, Lumdor, and Frans_Feiffer.

PM me if you have any questions about CO

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Sleepy Retard » 28 Sep 2018, 19:38

One last question before I give my verdict.

You mentioned another ship colliding with the ship you were on. What was the rational for not using it as a literary device in the story? For example, you could've dealt with a breach, or something to do with a ship sticking out the side of your ship. Instead, you decided to do the generic medbay fiasco. What gives?
Image I was a Synth Councilmen, alongside Jakkk, MattAtlas, SovietKitty and Omicega.

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Survivor » 28 Sep 2018, 23:13

El Defaultio wrote:
28 Sep 2018, 19:38
One last question before I give my verdict.

You mentioned another ship colliding with the ship you were on. What was the rational for not using it as a literary device in the story? For example, you could've dealt with a breach, or something to do with a ship sticking out the side of your ship. Instead, you decided to do the generic medbay fiasco. What gives?
Judging by how the USCM ships work, what I think happens is that there are automatic shutters that close the breaches before the ship gets depressurized. Evidence of this is the window shutters located on Prison Station, and the fact that the Alamo and Normandy don't cause major damages to life support systems. That's just my honest thought, so correct me if I'm wrong.


Speaking of which, the reason I specifically used the ship and this incident was to give a story that could technically fit into the lore. If you read the wiki, specifically the CLF section, they crashed a Freight Shuttle into the side of the USS Alistoun. This doesn't really contribute to the conversation that much, but I just wanted to throw that little bit of backstory in and do something original, as I thought it to be a pretty cool concept. I really could have done a better job with it, however as you said.


Anyway, thanks for the feedback.
"Sorry, but... I'm the only winner in this story." - Commander Pierce Jackson

Commodore Pierce Jackson/Jack "Survivor" Lance

SYN Simon

Young Blood Ha'ju Vagear

Part of the CO Council along with taketheshot56, Bancrose, Lumdor, and Frans_Feiffer.

PM me if you have any questions about CO

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Exodus » 29 Sep 2018, 15:27

I've seen you around on several occasions, and can't remember ever having any negative experiences with you. While my familiarity with you is primarily in a Command role, you retain a calm and collected spirit about you that I believe will suit you well to being a Synthetic.

Definite +1.
Hiya. I'm the player for Axel "Jackal" Freund, Battlefield Scavenger and War Hero extraordinaire. I also play Alexander, the sycophantic mimic Synthetic.

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Sleepy Retard » 30 Sep 2018, 11:15

I'll give my plus one for now, due to the responses on the story.
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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Jakkkk » 30 Sep 2018, 17:38

Survivor wrote:
28 Sep 2018, 16:42
When I said Simon wouldn't doubt himself, I meant that Simon wouldn't be the type of Synthetic to ignore an order due to the dangers as I've seen many players do.
Isn't that ignoring the self preservation programming in a sense?
Olaf's dossier: viewtopic.php?f=91&t=16128
Mortimer: viewtopic.php?f=149&t=16195
Xarvis Ut'ur-era: viewtopic.php?f=124&t=17817

Synthetic Council Term One, along with Sleepy Retard and MattAtlas.

"Harry, I'm going to let you in on a little secret. Every day, once a day, give yourself a present. Don't plan it. Don't wait for it. Just let it happen. It could be a new shirt at the men's store, a catnap in your office chair, or two cups of good, hot black coffee."

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Survivor » 30 Sep 2018, 17:39

Jakkkk wrote:
30 Sep 2018, 17:38
Isn't that ignoring the self preservation programming in a sense?
In a way, you can consider his quirk more lenient on the Self preservation if that makes more sense. Not flat out ignoring, of course.


An example of this is in the story, when instead of assisting the wounded who were dragged back, Simon goes to the dropship itself to assist those left behind. A dangerous scenario, as the boarders could have survived the crash
Last edited by Survivor on 30 Sep 2018, 17:42, edited 1 time in total.
"Sorry, but... I'm the only winner in this story." - Commander Pierce Jackson

Commodore Pierce Jackson/Jack "Survivor" Lance

SYN Simon

Young Blood Ha'ju Vagear

Part of the CO Council along with taketheshot56, Bancrose, Lumdor, and Frans_Feiffer.

PM me if you have any questions about CO

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Jakkkk » 30 Sep 2018, 17:41

Alright Survivor, you've responded to every concern of mine with confidence, logic, and respect. I'd love to have a synthetic like that, I was already leaning towards a +1 before asking any of these.

+1 friend, I'd be happy to have you aboard the synthetic whitelist.
Olaf's dossier: viewtopic.php?f=91&t=16128
Mortimer: viewtopic.php?f=149&t=16195
Xarvis Ut'ur-era: viewtopic.php?f=124&t=17817

Synthetic Council Term One, along with Sleepy Retard and MattAtlas.

"Harry, I'm going to let you in on a little secret. Every day, once a day, give yourself a present. Don't plan it. Don't wait for it. Just let it happen. It could be a new shirt at the men's store, a catnap in your office chair, or two cups of good, hot black coffee."

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Frans_Feiffer » 30 Sep 2018, 18:38

Not much else to be said that hasn’t been already. Good guy, with a good head on his shoulders. Knows what he’s doing and I think he has the right attitude in order to pull off being a Synthetic. Yes, the story could’ve used some work, but it conveys the way in which his Synth would act, and when questioned about it, you responded well and respectably.

So to sum it up, here’s my +1 friend. Use it wisely, and good luck.
“Your Friendly Neighborhood Commodore, Frans ‘Friendly’ Feiffer. Survivor of Space Vietnam, Austrian Kommodore vith ze vorst accent, and Loving Caretaker of the Ungas Aboard the USS Almayer.” Frans Feiffer's Promotion to Commander - viewtopic.php?f=142&t=18008
The Day I sold my Soul to Titan - viewtopic.php?f=69&t=18263
Yeyin R'ka Joins the Ranks of Blooded - viewtopic.php?f=125&t=18549
Darwin is Booted up and Assigned to the USS Almayer - viewtopic.php?f=149&t=18897
Commander Council term 1, Alongside the Men, the Myths, the Legends, Bancrose, Lumdor, Dr. Lance, and Taketheshot56. - viewtopic.php?f=137&t=18907
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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by taketheshot56 » 02 Oct 2018, 23:31

+1

Active guy, know exactly how he RPs and its well!

An interesting quirk!

Your backstory while short isnt a dealbreaker!
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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by CaptainYankee » 03 Oct 2018, 17:23

Easy +1.
Lot of time on the ground, tons of time aboard the Almayer. I have zero doubts that Simon will bring a lot of benefit to the marines.
Also, I liked the story. It shows that synth isn't always in the heart of the action, some rounds you do end up fixing APCs instead of building the FoB or working as some sort of triage doctor.
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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Sulaboy » 06 Oct 2018, 20:11

Survivor is a good player, and while the story ended up being very generic the application itself is solid. Your answers to the application questions are thought out, and give some good insight into your thoughts for making this. The only thing I could see is making your quirk work ingame, but I can see some ways it's work. +1
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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Survivor » 07 Oct 2018, 22:17

Sulaboy wrote:
06 Oct 2018, 20:11
Snip
CaptainYankee wrote:
03 Oct 2018, 17:23
Snip
taketheshot56 wrote:
02 Oct 2018, 23:31
Snip
Frans_Feiffer wrote:
30 Sep 2018, 18:38
Snip


Not much else to say besides thank you guys, for the support! It does mean a lot.
"Sorry, but... I'm the only winner in this story." - Commander Pierce Jackson

Commodore Pierce Jackson/Jack "Survivor" Lance

SYN Simon

Young Blood Ha'ju Vagear

Part of the CO Council along with taketheshot56, Bancrose, Lumdor, and Frans_Feiffer.

PM me if you have any questions about CO

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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Jarek » 07 Oct 2018, 22:51

Could have sworn I already posted on this.

Survivor is a good player, from my experience, They play commander well and I would not mind seeing them play synth as well.

+1
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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Epic_Charger » 08 Oct 2018, 06:15

I know how Survivor roleplays, and how he handles roles. He's got the experience for the role for sure. And with it, he has my +1
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Re: Simon - Synthetic Application

Post by Emeraldblood » 09 Oct 2018, 12:21

Resolved - Accepted
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